What I Wish Someone Told Me Before I Started My First Job
Silent workplace rules l had to learn the hard way
Just like any 20-something, I entered the corporate world with a college degree, hard work, and relentless focus. It took me about a year to find a stable job and adapt to office culture. And truth be told — I’ve experienced more heartbreaks in corporate life than in my personal life.
It took me several nasty conversations, difficult HR meetings, backstabbing, and a lot of trial and error to learn lessons that are so drilled in my head now.
Here are six things I wish I had known from the start, so I could better adapt to workplace.
1. Be vocal and proactive.
Upon entering the workforce, I felt a strong sense of duty to establish my capabilities. I would diligently tackle tasks without allowing myself any breaks. Even when faced with challenging situations, I hesitated to seek assistance, often opting to find solutions on my own, even if it meant investing more time.
A few months into this approach, during a performance review with my manager, he remarked,
“You come across as very reserved. Your body language around senior colleagues and peers makes it difficult for them to engage with you.”
This feedback left me momentarily speechless and disheartened. My intention was to avoid any perception of incompetence or over reliance on others. Regrettably, this meant that my commendable work often went unnoticed because I seldom spoke up about it.
This experience taught me the importance of taking initiative to communicate with supervisors and keeping them informed. Not only does this provide a broader perspective, but it also shines a light on your contributions. It conveys to others that you’re a collaborative team player who values diverse viewpoints. Additionally, when your manager is aware of the challenges you face, they are more likely to adjust their expectations and timelines accordingly..
2. Don’t fall for blanket statements
In my early corporate experience, my manager consistently conveyed that I wasn’t meeting expectations without providing specific guidance for improvement. This constant barrage of overgeneralized feedback eroded my confidence. I came to realize the significance of seeking actionable points rather than accepting sweeping statements. This approach not only leads to enhanced performance but also offers clear direction.
3. Take stand for yourself
In my very first job, I faced a recurring challenge with meeting deadlines. It wasn’t due to a lack of speed on my part, but rather because the scope of work was often unclear. I frequently found myself pulled away from front-end development to address gaps in design and APIs, incorporating feedback from the QA team, and rectifying invalid QA issues. Unfortunately, all the teams involved — QA, design, and backend — seemed to be operating on different wavelengths, leaving little room for collective discussion.
As a junior developer, I grappled with finding the right approach to raise these concerns without coming across as a complainer. It was a tricky balance to strike. There are moments in our careers that demand us to take a stand or speak up. It’s important to remember that silence can sometimes be mistaken for consent. By staying quiet, we inadvertently send the message that everything is fine, when in fact, it might not be.
I vividly recall instances where a colleague or manager spoke disrespectfully, assigned tasks beyond my scope, or dismissed my contributions to the project’s success. In those moments, I realized the importance of speaking up. Remaining silent only perpetuates the issue. It’s crucial to assert ourselves when necessary, for our own well-being and professional growth.
4. Create your own work-life balance
In my professional circle, I’ve noticed a common trend where friends and colleagues often extend their work into late nights and even weekends. There was a specific moment that highlighted this when a colleague kindly offered to be available for discussions even after official working hours. Initially, I was touched by his willingness to provide support beyond the typical 9 to 5.
However, as time went on, I began to understand the unintended message it sent — that being constantly accessible was the norm. It made me reflect on the importance of setting clear boundaries. I’ve made it a point to reach out to colleagues and send emails during regular business hours whenever feasible.
While policies may emphasize the significance of work-life balance, it ultimately rests on us to actively establish those boundaries. Taking the step to limit availability outside of regular work hours is a crucial initial move. Of course, it’s equally vital to openly communicate this to the rest of the team to ensure they understand and respect these boundaries, contributing to a healthier work-life equilibrium.
5. Avoid oversharing and talking too much
Recently, there’s been a notable shift in the perception of what’s considered appropriate to disclose in a professional setting. Widely circulated TED Talks, articles, and even LinkedIn posts champion the idea of “bringing your authentic self to work.” Yet, when I reflect on my early experiences in my initial job, I came to realize that being too transparent with superiors could have unintended consequences, ultimately negatively impacting my standing as an employee.
It took a series of challenging encounters, instances of betrayal, and candid conversations with trusted friends to grasp that the corporate world isn’t an idyllic realm where one’s worth is solely measured by performance and productivity. We’re operating in a space with genuine individuals, each with their own conscious and subconscious biases.
While it might seem perfectly ordinary to provide an elaborate response to a colleague’s casual query about weekend plans, the potential costs of such openness are often overlooked. Sharing in-depth details might inadvertently label you as careless or indifferent. Even innocuous revelations like a side hustle could signal to others that you’re considering a departure from your current role.
I distinctly recall an incident when I openly expressed to a seemingly approachable senior,
“I find it difficult to focus with constant checks, frequent updates, and time tracking.”
Just as my probation period was nearing its end, HR summoned me for a meeting, expressing concern that I had been disrespectful to my supervisors. They asked me to complete a form outlining my plans to improve my behavior moving forward.
I was taken aback, but later discovered that this information had been relayed by my senior and manager. It was then that I received invaluable advice from HR:
“Before sharing something, consider your audience and the environment.”
This counsel has since become a guiding principle in my professional interactions.
Certainly, I gained my wisdom through trial and error, and in hindsight, I wouldn’t exchange my youthful innocence for anything else. The challenges I faced were valuable lessons that shaped my understanding and perspective.