Redemption

I fully realize that the last song I posted was horrible, but it’s the thought that counts.

I get nervous and overly critical of myself when it comes to singing, and, truth be told, as much as I love music and karaoke, I am one of the last people on earth who would randomly burst out into song.

As anyone who has read my blog before knows, I am a huge fan of irony. The only place I feel comfortable singing is hiding behind a microphone…no clue why. It makes no sense. The microphone makes you louder, yet it’s like a security blanket that lets me feel like I’m hiding in some way.

Recording is worse. That’s when I really get in my head. Don’t mess up, Sarah. Don’t mess…whoops!

The more I think about not messing up, the more likely I am to mess up. The reason that I’m so shy about singing, I believe, is because I have high expectations for myself that I’m rarely able to meet. But I judge myself against my best performance. “Good” is never “good enough,” and not being “good enough” in public is humiliating. I need to get over myself lol.

Anyway, I was about to pull down that trainwreck of a song from my last post, but I decided not to. I’m not perfect and don’t always sound my best. I mean, the singing was ok…some parts were decent, but the audio quality itself was a hot mess. Again, that was 14 years ago. I was broke. My recording skills are not much better IMO, but I know my songwriting ability has improved. That is, when I’m not rusty as hell, like now.

I’ll put up in comparison a much better performance, with a talented audio engineer/producer (not me…he is the rapper on the song though). Maybe at some point I will write a song about what happened with him. No promises, no expectations.