No Gender November №13: Gender Gooey

Julian lives androgynous identity like the fine balance of masculine nutty crunch and soft spreadable femininity in a jar of all-natural chunky peanut butter.

Note: This is part of the November 2018 “No Gender November” portrait series on my 6yo’s lunch notes. Follow along and learn non-binary with me!
< №12 No Gender Generation | << Start at the beginning | №14 Embrace All the People You Will Become >

If gender fluid means moving between genders, gender queer is having many non-binary identities and gender needs to be classified at all, then Julian is gender gooey. While they very easily identify with either representations of males and females they don’t feel like they need to have a gender, and in fact don’t feel right when they are misgendered as either. Imagine being greeted as a man with “excuse me mam” or as a woman with “hello sir.” Julian is uncomfortable in either situation, but really comfortable as a self-defined person.

Julian’s an internet raised outsider filmmaker, gender historian and an openly non-binary staple of Instagram. If anyone can share a story of how representation affects the stigma surrounding nonbinary gender identity it’s them. “If I felt non-binary in the 70s and 80s, I don’t think I’d use they/them pronouns because society at large wouldn’t recognize it. Not that society at large recognizes it now, but this is mainstream enough that if you feel it and identify, you know there are other people who do. The biggest difference now is the understanding of gender. Older [queer] generation’s reference was ‘there’s two genders, I’m attracted to one of them.’”

I asked them what’s different now that’s brought about a new understanding of gender. Of course, they blame the internet. “The culture of a lot of individuals having a voice not typically represented is a big cultural shift.” The same medium that gave them a voice as a serious filmmaker gives a voice to nonbinary gender identity. If Julian’s following is any proof, thousands of people identify with them leaving messages like “it’s so cool you’re non-binary, I feel that way.” They’re a self defined androgynous German-Canadian Chicagoan blend of crunchy masculinity smoothed out with creamy soft femininity — all natural, no sugar added. Though it’s not for everyone, more people than you think love those chunky peanut butter vibes.