“Honour to Us All”

Gender Norms in Mulan and Romeo’s Societies

M.D.

Published in

In Fair Verona

7 min readNov 16, 2017

In Shakespeare’s Romeo and Juliet and Disney’s Mulan, the main characters each go against the parameters that society has set for them. However, Mulan reverts back to society’s ways while Romeo stays outside of others’ expectations. When introduced, each are viewed by their society as usual, but handle the judgement in different ways. Mulan responds to society’s critics by disguising herself as a man, while Romeo is not bothered by society’s judgements and remains unchanged, never swinging to one extreme or another. Each acts differently than their gender is supposed to, and thus neither feels as though they belong in their hometown.

Mulan is a spunky, bright girl set in a time where women’s voices are not heard. In the song “Honour to Us All” the women say that they are supposed to be “calm, obedient … work fast-paced with good breeding and a tiny waist.” They are supposed to rely on men and be “soft and pale.” In the song “Reflection”, Mulan says she is “In a world where [she] ha[s] to hide [her] heart, and what [she] believe[s] in.” Men, however, are able to choose what they want in a woman and have the leeway of desiring superficial things, like someone who is “paler than the moon, with eyes that shine like stars”. Mulan knows that this is the future for her because she is a girl, but she still desires to be something more than simply an object.

During Mulan’s time, men are supposed to be strong and brave. When war comes to Mulan’s village, each family is expected to send one male to fight. Mulan is an only child whose father is crippled. The choice is either dishonour for her family or the certain death of her father — or in Mulan’s eyes, becoming the families “male” representative. When Mulan goes to war, the general mockingly asks if he was sent “daughters, when [he] asked for sons” showing that because the men are not strong or brave enough by his standards, they are feeble, like women. He also says that the warriors are “a spineless, pale, pathetic lot,” showing that female qualities like being pale are weak in men. This shows that there are three choices in Mulan’s society: to be a proper girl, a strong boy, or an outcast. Mulan risks becoming an outcast to protect her father. In doing so she proves that she is stronger and more brave than many of the actual men, and that not all girls are timid and scared.

Mulan knows that she should not develop her own opinions and, even if she does, she should not act on them. However, she desires to do what she knows is right, even if it goes against her society’s guidelines for being a woman. She dresses up as a man to go to war and tries to become more “manly” by changing her clothes and voice. This dramatic irony is shown when the general is singing about being a man, while Mulan, a girl, bests all of the men at a task. She is breaking the conventions of society and proving that while she is a girl, she can still be strong and brave.

Romeo is also different than society believes he should be. Women in Romeo’s time are looked upon similarly to how they are in Mulan’s time. Men are supposed to be logical and always ready to fight and protect, but Romeo doesn’t enjoy fighting. When we first meet him, he asks Benvolio “What fray was here? Yet tell me not, for I have heard it all” (1.1.178–9) showing that he does not care about fighting. He is looked upon by his friends and family as womanly because of his dreamy disposition and opposition to fighting. In act 2 scene 1, Romeo’s friends make fun of him calling him “lover”, “passion” and a “madman”, teasing him for always falling in, and out of, love. They also say that he thinks with his heart, not his head, which is something that women are believed to do. Because he thinks with his heart, he is quite dramatic, and this womanly quality leads to his death. In his time women rely on the men to make decisions for them, and no man relies on anyone else. However, Romeo relies on others to make his choices for him. For example, when he is banished, he goes to Friar Lawrence and threatens to kill himself. Friar Lawrence responds saying “thou tears are womanish … unseemly woman in a seeming man” (3.3.120–122). The nurse also things he is womanly and says to Romeo “Stand an you be a man. For Juliet’s sake…”(3.3.96–97) showing that she believes that Romeo should be strong and present for Juliet when she cries, but should not cry himself. However, Romeo relies on the Friar to calm him down when he is emotional, something that a man would usually do to a woman. Romeo’s more feminine qualities lead him to rely on his emotions and act rashly, which results in his death.

During Mulan and Romeo and Juliet, there are many options for the characters to turn back and fit in with society, but only Mulan reverts back to being more submissive. Mulan earns her respect as a girl, but when she returns to her home, she bows to her father while promising that she will never disrespect him or go against the laws again. This is very different from how calm and confident she was before. She doesn’t stand up for her ideas and how she thought it was a good plan to go to war in place of her father. This shows that she no longer feels safe to voice her opinion because of her gender. While she was a man, she sometimes went against what her commander said for the good of the people, and always stuck up for her actions. Now that she is back to acting like a girl, she no longer sticks up for her ideas, but surrenders to society’s judgements.

In contrast, Romeo continues to act more “womanly” throughout the play. After Friar Lawrence chastises him for being feminine, he leaves Verona trying to act more “manly” and strong. However, when he is forced to confront Juliet’s death, Friar Lawrence is not there to aid him, thus his decision is much more rash. When he hears of his lover’s death, he goes to an apothecary to get a potion that will “dispatch [him] straight” (5.2.83). In Shakespeare’s plays there are two main ways for a character to die; poison and a blade. Of the two, women usually use poison, while men use a sword. Romeo’s use of poison when he had a blade on his person is Shakespeare’s way of showing that Romeo has more of a feminine temperament. Both Romeo and Mulan take society’s criticism and respond to it differently. Romeo never wavers while Mulan wavers when it is critical, but never reverts to society’s demands.

Abstract

For this project, I wanted to figure out how Romeo acting womanly lead up to his death. I wanted to find another movie or song that showed a character that was different than the norm, and was inspired by Mulan. I found that while Mulan and Romeo’s journeys both look very similar, they were actually quite different. Romeo reacted to the knowledge of his uniqueness by basically shrugging it off, content with who he was. Mulan, however, took others critiques and decided to throw herself into living life as a man. I think it is interesting to see how different people react to the same problem, and how the one that may seem to have more at stake (Mulan changing her gender) actually made her appreciate being a girl more, while Romeo never experienced anything else, so his action was more womanly when faced with Juliet’s death.