How to Be an Empty Cup: Letting Go of Ego and Other Lessons From Jiu-Jitsu
The other day, after jiu-jitsu class, one of the instructors sat us down in a circle for a post-class discussion. It was a hot, humid day in Los Angeles, and there wasn’t a dry gi, the term for the standard jiu-jitsu uniform, in the room.
“I know you’re all eager to learn,” he says. “You want to get better, faster.”
There were a lot of white belts — the true sign of a beginner — in the room that night. I was one of them. I know I’m not the only one who looked around enviously at the higher belts. I also know I’m supposed to enjoy the journey, to embrace being a beginner — but the day can’t come soon enough that I’m at least a blue belt, the next belt level up from white.
“My advice?” He pauses, looking around the room. “Be an empty cup. Leave your ego at the door. That’s the only way you’re going to learn and improve.”
He’s right, of course. I’ve been involved in combat sports for the past four years, beginning with boxing, my first love. When I started boxing, my ego was in full control. Because I was already strong and athletic, I thought I’d be able to skip steps in the learning process. As a result, I had gaps in my learning to the point where I didn’t even know how to block a basic jab in my first amateur boxing match. No one had ever…
