Why Do People Leave the Christian Faith? 7 Reasons and Responses

As recently as 2022, Pew Research Center reported that as much as one third of US individuals raised Christian leave the faith between the ages of 15 and 29.

To the world, this may read like any other statistic. To the Christian world — especially those involved in evangelism, discipleship, and church-planting — it’s painful to encounter.

It also ought to be a wakeup call.

For centuries, individuals across the world have pondered why people who once saw Christ as their Lord and Savior now shun the thought. There are many reasons that Christians and non-Christians alike have brought up that must be addressed.

Any Christ follower who’s committed to growing the body of Christ and supporting individuals on their walk to a deeper faith must be aware of why people exit the faith. Pew Research, including other research tanks, show that if current attrition continues, Christianity will become a minority religion in the United States within a few years.

Let’s look at the leading reasons people leave Christianity and how those in the faith can respond.

1. Applying Human Mistakes to a Perfect God

There’s no denying that humanity is flawed. This is a shared belief among different people groups regardless of their religious perspectives.

Everyone from a misanthrope to a Muslim (and everyone in between) agrees humanity has problems; most people differ in what those problems are, the solutions, and how to provide solutions.

Christianity is a bit different, though. Jesus, the center of all Christian life, spoke of His status as God multiple times. Many other Bible passages also reference Jesus’s perfection. Here are a few highlights:

• Matthew 5:48: “Be perfect, therefore, as your heavenly Father is perfect.” (If Jesus is God, then He is perfect)
• 2 Corinthians 5:21: “For our sake he made him to be sin who knew no sin, so that in him we might become the righteousness of God.”
• 1 Peter 1:19: “But with the precious blood of Christ, like that of a lamb without blemish or spot.”
• Hebrews 7:26: “For it was indeed fitting that we should have such a high priest, holy, innocent, unstained, separated from sinners, and exalted above the heavens.”
• Acts 4:12: “And there is salvation in no one else, for there is no other name under heaven given among men by which we must be saved.”

What does that mean?

Well, humans being humans, we tend to ascribe the characteristics of a leader to their followers.

It’s been easy for many people to think that because Jesus was perfect, a Christian must also be perfect.

It’s surprising and sometimes downright painful to discover when a Christian is not.

While perfection through grace and sanctification alone is absolutely the work of the Holy Spirit, perfection is impossible this side of Heaven.

There are zero exceptions to that rule, except for Jesus Himself of course.

To add to that, I can’t tell you how many times I’ve had secular or atheist friends say, “I don’t want to do or say X because you’re pure and I don’t want to ruin that.”

Ha, if only it were so.

“Wait a minute,” you may be blurting out. “Isn’t the point of being a Christian to become perfect like Christ?”

Yes and no.

Yes, because verses like 2 Thessalonians 2:13 show us that the Holy Spirit’s sanctifying work is always active and making authentic believers more like Jesus.

No, because humanity is not perfect and never will be apart from Christ’s saving blood. God, being holy, cannot be in the presence of anything that is not holy, and therefore exists apart from fatally flawed humanity.

So, how is this relevant to humans blaming God for other humans’ mistakes?

Experiencing unfulfilling or openly sinful Christian culture and community as a non-believer is a terrible experience.

It doesn’t show God’s real character, gives a bad rap to the supposed Christians, and makes everything look insincere.

Of course, no mature Christian is without responsibility when it comes to their thoughts, actions, and relationships.

So, how can the mature Christian respond to the current or former Christian who’s walked away from the faith because of real human imperfections?

• Walk with current believers in love. Colossians 3 talks about the characteristics we’re to exhibit to one another as Christians. It’s a tall order, and it should be. Daily kindness, patience, and humility are serious goals and should be chased after in earnest.
• Set a standard for everyone around you. Ephesians 5 commands us to be imitators of God and walk in love with those around us. The best way to show love to others is to look to God as our example, in all things.
• Ask for forgiveness. Dozens of verses throughout the Old and New Testament remind us of both what forgiveness looks like and the fact that God did this for us. When we make a mistake, we need to ask for forgiveness and walk in grace.
• Be open to conversations with non-believers. I’m ashamed that many Christians, myself included, have often overcomplicated matters of speaking with and learning from non-believers. Whether someone once followed Christ and no longer does or never knew Him to begin with, many people simply want to be listened to. They want a seat at the table and to be recognized for who they are. If you offer this to them, they will often appreciate you for the simple fact that you’re open-minded. Don’t try to throw a bunch of Scripture at them; just be present and listen.

2. Having a Poor Church Experience

Many Christians and former Christians cite a sour church experience for their weakening faith or a faith that no longer exists. Here are a few stats that show just how disillusioned many individuals, especially young people in the church, have become:

• One third of young people say church is boring (Barna)
• A little less than a quarter say the Bible isn’t taught often enough or clearly (Barna)
• One quarter of young adults also say the Christian faith isn’t relevant to their interests or career (Barna)
• More than one third say Christians at large come across as too confident that they know all the answers when it comes to science (Barna)
• One in five young adults with a Christian background say church feels too insular, much like a country club (Barna)
• 36% of young adults don’t feel like they can ask their most pressing life questions in a church environment (Barna)

Pretty sobering data.

It’s not easy to swallow these facts. And it shouldn’t be.

This is a much-needed slap in the face for church leaders and staff who believe that the mindsets, perspectives, and strategies that worked for former generations

Is that an excuse for myself and those who agree with me to be ungraciously heavy-handed or to abandon the fruits of the Spirit?

No, not whatsoever.

It’s an opportunity for committed Christ followers to come together, put unnecessary differences aside, and develop a 360-degree plan to reach young individuals through love, truth, and grace.

We’ve all heard that young people are the future… and it’s true. It doesn’t matter how often you’ve heard it, who’s said it, or when and where they’ve said it.

If your church isn’t prioritizing young people, you aren’t prioritizing your growth or stability.

What can you do?

• Teach the Bible and teach it boldly. You aren’t going to persuade new and old Christians alike to stand firm in faith if you’re softballing them. Cover the basics, yes, but teach the entire Bible in context. Do it early and often.
• Talk about today’s issues from a Biblical standpoint. Matters like porn, money, human trafficking, politics, abortion, veganism, class warfare, racism, and inequality aren’t going to be solved with a snap of Christian fingers or sheer ignorance. Many people care about many of these issues, and they’ll find ways to engage with them whether or not Christians do. It benefits both your church and your mind — and the minds within the church — to engage these issues and apply Biblical action to them. You’re not responsible for saving the world; only Jesus can do that. But ignorance is not the path to a God-honoring life on Earth. Roll up your sleeves and discuss these issues head-on.
• Welcome people openly while holding them accountable. This is probably the most difficult and most important challenge. People are looking for a place to enrich their lives, and churches are rarely thought of as a place to do this. It’s the church’s responsibility to love people early and well. But love doesn’t mean zero accountability. If young people are disgruntled and looking for more/better/deeper, recognize their desire and challenge them to be part of the solution they’re looking for.

3. Applying One Christian’s Mistakes to All Christians Everywhere

It’s an unfortunate reality that many people apply one Christ follower’s mistakes to the rest of Christianity.

No authentic Christian ever has the freedom to live life in contrast to God and His ways.

But people are going to make mistakes. That’s life.

A Christian has not lost their salvation or failed because they made a

Heinous, open sin must be confronted and done so with grace. Matthew 18 is clear about that.

But the occasional trip-up has happened and will continue to happen.

So how does the mature Christian respond?

• Be open about your shortcomings — to your spouse, friends, family, and church. Few people, secular or otherwise, have an issue with someone who knows they aren’t perfect. The issue is when someone acts like being a Christian has given them a privilege before God and man that no one else has. Becoming a Christian changes you forever but it doesn’t give you the freedom to
• Acknowledge your mistakes before God. The goal of Christian life is not to develop a false sense of comfort in God’s grace. It’s to accept that grace and use it to pursue excellence, for both God’s glory and human fulfillment through Jesus (2 Peter 1).

4. Being Ill-Informed and Ill-Equipped

It’s less of a secret these days that not all churches are doing their best to provide solid teaching and direction for both mature and newfound believers.

Young people see through this more than ever, as evidenced by the statistics above. They don’t want a fairy-tale, paper-thin mockery of Christianity.

They’re looking for the real thing or nothing at all.

On this point, unhealthy churches really don’t have a leg to stand on.

Some churches and pastors would rather talk about only the topics that keep their existing supporters happy, rather than get to the real topics and risk losing the interest of some who were never following Christ anyways.

Of course, plenty of churches don’t buy into this, and that’s a great thing. There are more leaders and congregants waking up to the urgency of the Gospel and the need for Christians to live now for God.

How can you keep your church well-informed and well-equipped?

• Have a plan for your church, its message, and its purpose. Some churches get so wrapped up in focusing on how they can increase their numbers that they forget the most important thing: helping people draw closer to Jesus.
• Evaluate how well your church embodies the characteristics of a healthy church. Mark Ballenger’s 24 Signs of a Super Healthy Church is — as far as I’ve seen so far — the golden standard. Depending on how much or little your church exercises self-awareness, this will be a useful tool in understanding where you can improve.
• Make the truth a central focus. The enemy doesn’t need to do much to get people to believe a lie. All that’s required in most cases is to spread the lie often and loudly. If the truth is shared more often and strongly throughout not just your church, but the communities in your church, it will be much easier to cast out the devil’s ways whenever they appear.
• Pray. Prayer is vital to the Christian faith — not because God gives us what we want, but because God shapes us into who He wants us to be. Prayer is also an essential way to acknowledge God in all things and create space for the Holy Spirit.
• Fast. Jesus and many other believers fasted throughout Scripture, yet it’s one of the least acknowledged and least practiced aspects of the Christian faith today. I’ve come to learn that fasting is not optional. Reserve space for this essential behavior to put your entire focus on God for a time.

5. Leaders Dropping the Ball In a Dire Time of Need

This one hits close to home for me.

Not long ago, I was going through arguably the most painful time of my life.

I was facing the reality that I had married a covert narcissist who wasn’t only abusing me, but also openly abandoning essentials of the faith.

She claimed to be a Christian only for that claim to be tested time and time again in her life, by multiple people, and later to be proven wrong by her own actions.

At the time, I sought as much help as possible from leaders within my church. Both those I already knew (and who knew me) and those who didn’t know me.

I found no help from them.

I don’t expect other adults to drop their entire lives for someone who’s going through a difficult time.

I don’t even expect them to treat every claim of abuse as legitimate (though that’s a pretty hard bargain, all things considered).

I do expect Christian leaders to be available, listen, and speak the truth when the harrowing moments of life call them to their responsibility.

What can you do to prevent similar things from happening in your church?

• Adopt and maintain an end-to-end view of the most common relational problems. Human life invariably involves much of the unexpected. You’re going to have experiences and events — congregant or pastor — that have you wondering whether you know up from down. Narcissism and abuse are two perfect examples. Get familiar about these today and know what’s legit vs what isn’t so when someone in your church brings it up, you know the signs as to whether or not they’re telling the truth.
• Equip yourself and your staff with the best training possible. The enemy’s on the loose, looking for anyone he can devour (1 Peter 5:8). He’s going to take out anyone he can if they don’t know how to stand against his lies. Equipping your staff refers to everything — how to treat people with grace and kindness all the way to how to handle emergencies and chaotic individuals. Anything that can happen usually does happen — be prepared for it before you can’t do much about it.
• Be alert at all times. One of the greatest things Christians can learn from the secular / professional world is situational awareness. And this is both physically and spiritually beneficial. Situational awareness is the process of paying attention to what’s happening around you, particularly with other people. When people refer to “condition yellow,” this means relaxed, but alert. It means you should always be looking for potential threats in your surroundings while still responding appropriately to the situation in front of you.
• Establish a written leadership code of conduct. This is one way to greatly reduce the chances that any of your leaders act with incongruence to not just your values but those of the Bible. Perfection is not and cannot be the standard. What is essential is embodying the love and strength of Christ for those who need it, when they need it most.

6. Itching Ears

For having one of the most direct and perhaps obvious Bible verses, it’s surprising how often this fact is overlooked. 2 Timothy 4:3 says, “For the time is coming when people will not endure sound teaching, but having itching ears they will accumulate for themselves teachers to suit their own passions.”

This verse refers to the end times when people won’t want to listen to the truth of the Bible, but instead will look for people and sources that tell them what they want to hear.

Instead of following Biblical truth and letting it reign over their lives, people will look for validation of their sinful ideas, human desires, and corrupt ways.

This is heartbreaking for the Christian to witness.

Many people will simply give Christianity up because it doesn’t feel good to them. A church could be operating well, offer abundant grace, and be based on solid Biblical principles, but people will still walk away.

This is human nature.

As much as human desire gratifies the flesh, we cannot allow it to override our commitment to Jesus.

How do you respond?

• Show the Bible in context. One of the worst things Christians can do is to cherry-pick the Bible or remove it from context. The Bible isn’t even a single book; it’s a collection of writings that span countries, writers, eras, and audiences. Some books are historical and liturgical; others are poetic; still others are symbolic and prophetic. Many others are instructional. Everything must be shown and understood in context; otherwise, it’s no wonder many young people see the Bible as an irrelevant or even harmful text to ridicule.
• Have multiple ways to show and affirm the authenticity of the Bible. Thousands of people have said they’d consider Christianity more legitimate if they could verify the historicity of the Bible. Good news for them — we can! There are many resources that address this legitimate need.

7. An Incomplete or Inaccurate Worldview

In a nutshell, a worldview is the core beliefs that shape your identity, behavior, and destiny in the world. Worldviews can contain hundreds of individual beliefs, but in its simplest form, a worldview must include:

• Your belief of how the universe came to be
• Your belief of how humanity reached its present state
• Your belief for the purpose of your own life
• Your belief regarding death and what happens (if anything) after death

For long-standing Christians, education on a Biblical worldview is often taken for granted. It’s how many older Christians were raised — not just in the home but in the church.

Some Christ followers may be shocked to discover that a little more than one third of pastors hold a Biblical worldview and that only about one in 10 individual Christians hold a Biblical worldview. Times have changed, to say the least.

How did this happen? Years of pop psychology, scientific information, syncretism, and Biblical illiteracy have both dulled critical thought and made it harder to convince individuals of the truth.

When false, misleading, or incomplete information is shared far and wide for decades at a time, people latch on to it. If you challenge those narratives, you’re ridiculed at best and considered an enemy at worst.

So, what is a Biblical worldview? A Biblically accurate worldview states:

• An all-powerful, all-loving, all-just God created the universe and its inhabitants, including humans (Genesis 1:27)
• God created man and woman in Eden and gave them free will. After man’s irresponsible use of that freedom, he sinned, God rejected him, and humanity has been separated from God ever since (Genesis 3:23)
• God created humanity, specifically His chosen people (Israel) to bring Him glory, honor, and praise (Isaiah 43:21)
• God gave humans a temporary physical existence, but an eternal spiritual existence (Matthew 25:46). By God sending His son, Jesus, to die on a cross, this allowed a blameless sacrifice to atone for the sins of humanity and make possible the opportunity for people to spend eternity with God (John 3:16, Romans 6:23). Those who do not accept Jesus as their Lord will face the eternal wrath of God (2 Thessalonians 1:8–9).

Well… that’s a lot. If you made it this far, you’re probably a pretty committed Christian, someone who’s curious about matters of the church, or perhaps even a critic. I welcome it all.

A few things are clear:

• People have never craved or sought authenticity like they do today. And is that any surprise? In a world where entertainment is contrived, food is garbage, money is fake, and relationships are surface-level, people don’t want any of the BS anymore. They’re looking for something that rocks their world so much they can’t ignore it.
• Young people can see through the hokey, country club Christianity of yesteryear. They don’t want it, and they’ll never validate it. I say good. That’s how it oughta be. Christ wasn’t fake; He was the realest who ever lived. Churches, American and otherwise, should be a constant reflection of Christ’s authenticity — from our words to our thoughts to our actions. Examine your church and look for any area you’re being inauthentic, especially with young people. Commit to changing that.
• There’s more than enough room to engage purposefully with young people without selling out. Many Christians believe that it’s just a small number of people with bad experiences who leave the church. Reality paints a different story. Young people aren’t right about everything, and Biblical literacy is a foundational element necessary for any honest conversation about the faith. But much of American Christianity has become insular and refuses to fight the corruption and lies of today’s world through a Biblical, timeless lens. Church staff can step up and win more souls through the Holy Spirit’s power if they commit to being the leaders they know they can be and want to be.

Take this information and use it to be the most effective Christian, church, or leader you can be. Don’t try to be perfect. Don’t try to solve all problems or answer all questions. But focus on what you can do and be fully present in it.