Heimweh
German equivalent for feeling homesick or nostalgia
Most of us have felt it at some point in our life and for some of us, the feeling never goes away. It can be uncomfortable and overwhelming. It is a strange mixture of impatience and hopelessness that can quickly lead to a continuous state of anxiousness.
“ Formally defined, Third-Culture Kids TCKs are people who have spent a portion of their formative childhood years (0–18) in a culture different than their parents’. Most TCKs will return to their parents’ home country at some point in their lives, undergoing repatriation.
They tend to develop their identities while living abroad, thus blending their “home” culture with the culture of the world around them. People who have attended international schools, who are children of diplomats, “military brats,” or children of missionaries are just a few examples of TCKs.
Very often, this kind of life comes from the parents who are expats, and as most expat contracts, their duration lasts between 2 and 5 years. Once the contract ends, the process starts all over again: moving trucks, planes, airports, new circle of friends, new country…
With all of that comes new adventures, new places to discover and eventually new traditions are put in place until just when they all become routine — it’s already the end of the contract.
There are so many advantages in being a TCK. Traveling the world isn’t a possibility given to everyone and getting to discover all the different cultures is a blessing in itself.
Knowing that the world is so big and that you’ve seen more than you could have dreamed was possible is something to be proud of.
And yet, just like every story, there is another side to it: Some days, the world doesn’t seem all that big but at the same time you feel incredibly small, lost among billions of other civilisations.
Being homesick implies that you already consider a place to be home. A place where you have childhood memories and family to go to, a place where you remeber your first time riding a bike, where you remember having your first kiss, where you remember graduating in front of the whole town…. Traveling from one continent to another often makes TCKs realize that their roots are implanted everywhere and nowhere at the same time.
If home was a place, it probably would be above the clouds, in the sky, overlooking the million littles lights beneath.
I never got rid of feeling homesick. I always feel like an outsider. The only way I found to accept it and be more or less comfortable with it, is the knowledge of the friends I have. I don’t have that many-and most of them don’t even live on the same side of the planet-but they’re there.
They might take a while to answer your messages, they might be going to sleep while you’re waking up but they will always have your back. They know that the relationship they share with you is unlike any other. Conversation don’t get boring and new plans and ideas are always shared.
You realize the value of time spent with them because of its rarity.
If you’re not used to travelling, don’t worry about feeling homesick: Home will be always be there and nothing is changing. Your apartment will look the same as when you left it, the restaurant you usually go to for lunch with your colleagues will still be there with your favorite dishes and most importantly,
-the ones you said goodbye to will be there to say welcome back-
Make the most of wherever you are. Don’t sit in your hotel room thinking about home.
Discover the city, talk to the people, read a book in a hidden cafe, go get lost in the small streets, listen to all the different sounds… The atmosphere and enery surrounding you is completely new territory and that’s the amazing part.
You get to be whoever you want. You get to make new habits and you get to create the traditions you’ve always dreamed of having.
Home isn’t that far, and trust the TCK’s:
Home isn’t a place, it’s just a feeling that can be resolved with a phone call.
