गुरूर ब्रह्मा गुरूर विष्णु,
गुरु देवो महेश्वरा,
गुरु साक्षात परब्रह्म,
तस्मै श्री गुरुवे नमः
I was probably around eight years old, very keen to start music lessons and unable to wait till my parents find me a good music teacher! So, as a very independent creature , I went to a Bengali friend of mine, on my own, who was already pursuing music, met her teacher and expressed my intention to learn music from him. He agreed, without checking if I have enough potential! Overjoyed, I came home, announced to my parents I have a music teacher and my music lessons starts coming week ! My parents were amused but they still met the teacher and formally requested him to start teaching me ! Probably they were not aware of the consequences of this trivial event and wanted me to be occupied with something creative as I was a high energy kid.
The weekly lessons started and after the first class the teacher announced I have great potential and will go places if continue to learn music under HIS guidance!! One can imagine the ecstasy of an eight year old, full of life, enthusiastic kid and the sheer happiness to pursue a subject and hobby, devoid of any worldly, commercial reward!! My parents were also very happy and supportive as usual. Though I was an outdoor person, still felt happy spending an hour with the Harmonium and the teacher, that too in the evenings when all the kids were playing and shouting at the top of their voices, alluring me to join them, whereas poor me focusing on the notes and the effort to sing! Though singing comes naturally to me but there is huge difference between writing on wall and writing between two lines of a notebook!
There was no music background at our home except that my mother used to listen to music when I was in her womb and later on sang lullabies to us which still is the most beautiful memory of my life. My father has very good understanding of music like all sensitive people, though he sang only Namami Samisan Nirvaan Roopam and Tim Tim karte tare karte hain ishaare’ That was the ONLY music background I had, apart from the fact that almost everybody in the family (except my two siblings) used to sing quite well. And all family gatherings were occasions where we all were free to torture the neighbors! It’s a different story that neighbors started joining us on such gatherings and the gatherings and craziness got bigger and beautiful in every way!
Now, coming back to my music lessons — I used to be awestruck when the teacher used to play Harmonium and sing, and mind it, BOTH AT THE SAME TIME! it was at the later stage I came to know that the teachers who keep playing harmonium like jugglers while teaching the kid are not at all good music teachers! Harmonium is just a supportive instrument which helps the student understand his/her scale, modulate the voice and sing accordingly. The student is supposed to stick to the scale and explore his/her vocal cords through pure notes, like a toddler starts to walk, only difference — the journey is musical and goes down deeper and deeper with time, leaving permanent marks in subconscious mind.
However, my tryst with music lessons continued. Most of the times I kept sitting with folded legs and full concentration, in front of the teacher and he made all sort of faces and comical expressions while singing and playing harmonium vigorously. Again, at a later stage I came to know that those comical expressions were considered as ‘Mudra Dosh’ in classical music and students are advised to sing in front of mirror to avoid that. Most interesting part was that my poor parents kept paying the bill to ill educate me in music and I kept learning various types of facial expressions and gestures and’ Mudra Dosh’ to be precise and wrong pronunciation of various poetic words of beautiful classical compositions came free with it ! I wonder, how many budding music talents are being destroyed by such teachers !! Finding a great teacher is half the journey completed, as I look at it now!
Do teachers really understand and realize the responsibility they shoulder?
However, it was at the end of the month, whole of our family looked at each other with amusement, when the teacher left after taking his remuneration, which was demanded like — ‘माँ को बोलो मेरा बेतोन देगा !” (tell your mom to pay my fee)!! As soon as he left after taking his remuneration, all of us burst into laughter!! No, we were not having fun on his cost, he made a fun of himself by saying this ! My poor mother felt insulted, she was already prepared with the money in an envelop!! Being a teacher herself, she felt it too bad that he demanded his remuneration without giving a thought of teacher’s dignity and did not even give her a chance to pay him in time!!
The lessons continued and the confusion too! Music for me was just copying the tune and singing it in front of the teacher. I did not understand the relation between the notes and why a particular Raag is sung in a particular time of the day. The great science and the connection between human heart and music was untouched and unexplored. My voice certainly was getting refined but I still faced problem with high notes and the teacher had no idea how to frame the lessons for me so that I can touch high notes with ease and clarity. He was more focused on completing the syllabus and making me appear for first years exam. Later on I came to know the examining bodies close the music learning centers with less then required number of students appearing for the exams!!
There were seven Raag’s in first years syllabus, as I remember now and that was not a big deal. So basic learning of seven Raag’s with some introduction, a Khayal, some Alaap and Taan was in my control. But the words of the composition were so confusing because the Bengali accent was horrible and the teacher wasn’t even aware of that, that he needs to improve his diction and pronunciation to make it clear and understandable for the students and to do justice to the compositions! Just look at the composition with such lovely words :
डगर चलत छेड़े श्याम सखी री
मैं दूँगी गारी (गाली)
निपट अनाड़ी
Now, imagine it being sung as:
डोगोर चोलोत छेड़े शायम सोखि री
माइन दूँगी गाड़ी
निपोटो ओनाडी
Even if the kid copies the correct word by virtue of his/her little knowledge of the language, how can the meaning and the feeling associated with it be known to the kid? A nine year old has certainly not experienced the teasing and the bitter sweet feeling of being followed by a boy ! I tell you, those pre teen years and the feeling of understanding and still not understanding the secrets of life! Ah what a disaster ! Adding to the misery, sisters hiding and giggling behind the curtains looking at the teacher and making faces to me and enjoying my torture! Needless to say, those evening lessons became monotonous and torturous for me and the commotion and fun outside the home became more alluring and after two exams I GAVE UP on my own and felt guilty about it. I thought this is THE END of my musical dreams.
The teacher got furious that I refused to learn from him and said I will never find a teacher like him! And how correct was he, I never did!!
The teachers who blessed me with their tutelage and association were yet to come, I was yet to be groomed, nurtured and taken care of. I was yet to unlearn those lessons which were wrongly and carelessly taught to me just because music was not a passion for the person who was my first teacher. But again that took years and patience on other teachers part and a good couple of years to make me unlearn those lessons which were wrongly taught to me.
Those two years taught me not about music but about bad and commercial teachers with little knowledge, understanding and love for the subject. We still have such teachers and they will always be around, damaging the little awestruck ones and therefore, society at large!
Those two years also taught me that one should not teach or try to become a teacher of a subject he/she is not passionate about. Teachers not only impart education, they create interest in the subject for ever, through their love for the subject. One loves the teacher hence loves the subject. They share not only their knowledge but the dream and vision too and motivate the student through love to reach for the stars.
I still have great respect for good teachers and will always have, more so because I have encountered a real bad one in my formative years.
