Are you making yourself Sad?

Since I started studying happiness, I was astonished by the people who easily experience joy in their lives without any appearing effort. On the other hand, I was sad most of the time, no matter how hard I tried to be happier or forget about sadness for a while.

I became more desperate when I read the study made by Ragnhild Bang Nes & Espen Røysamb, indicating that 32–40 % of a person’s happiness is due to his genes. I started telling myself, is trying to make myself happier is like trying to make myself taller? Am I delusional?

All of my life, I was not the person who can give up quickly, so I started thinking about the remaining 60% percent; why am I giving upon them. Born unhappy maybe not a choice but dying unhappy is.

I monitored everything that made me unhappy for a year, every thought and feeling I wrote them down, I started to discover a pattern or recurring events and reactions.

I found out that the main reasons for my unhappiness come from thinking in a certain way.

1- Comparison:

Imagine yourself driving your brand-new car in an empty street, enjoying the moment and being fulfilled by your hard-earned car; suddenly, your dream car just stopped next to you in the traffic light. Are you still going to have the same level of happiness you were having…