Thoughts And Ideas
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Thoughts And Ideas

Beauty is in the eye of the beholder

Call it a reality, call it an illusion. I define it as perception.

Photo by Bradley Pisney on Unsplash

I’d like to share my thoughts about how I have reached a point where I generally define everything as mere perception.

“From where you see is what you see, synonymous to, you will always see what you wish to see.”

A simple example you stand outside the door and call it the entry, you go inside and call the same door as the exit. Such is the case with the world as well. You might feel a person is absolutely unproductive and doing nothing in his life, but there is a high chance he is as smart in a different domain, slowly overcomings his battles, and will go on to achieve a lot of success in the future. In the very same way, a scenario that feels like a nightmare right now might feel like a blessing a few years later, almost all of us might have been through such times in the past, where we did not at all like any of it, but today when we look back, we feel grateful and happy that it happened.

Another important thing I wish to mention is our perception is mostly a product of the small incidences that we witnessed or were a part of. I’d love to share a short story to elaborate on this. Right from my childhood, I loved watching football, and in the 2006 Fifa World Cup, Zidane headbutted Materazzi, then I read about how Materazzi had instigated him and what made Zidane take the action he took. I loved Zidane and he doing something like that in his final game with France, and France going on to lose the World Cup had a lasting impact on me. I started disliking Italy, and not just their football team, but I started feeling it is a country full of bad people, people who do bad things to others. I was very young, I probably did not even know what had happened in totality. Only years later, I read more about it, I read more about Italy and now I don’t dislike them in any way whatsoever. So, basically, I mean to say even the smallest of events shape our thoughts in ways that are beyond our understanding, and we should hence always question our thoughts our perceptions, why do I not like Italy, what is wrong with the country, I have never been there, nor have I read enough about them, what makes me dislike them when you ask questions like these, you are able to pinpoint to occurrences which built that perception in the first place and then you can slowly work towards changing it and making it more inclusive, and not let one small event define your complete judgment.

Moreover, a coin has two sides, but we are not coins, we homo sapiens can and mostly always do have a lot more sides, a few of our sides are genuinely good and liked by a lot of people, a few others by some folks and a few hate the very same sides of ours. An example of this could be that of a standup comedian, almost everyone loves their humor and jokes, but as soon as we are in the audience and at the receiving end, we dislike it, we even go on to think, the comedian could have been a little more thoughtful before cracking that joke, completely forgetting the fact that it is only for fun and they are jokes which we should not be taking seriously.

Photo by Paul Skorupskas on Unsplash

So not all our sides are good, and nor do all our sides will be liked by everyone, the sides which make a few happy can absolutely make others feel irritated. It does not mean you are at fault, neither does it mean they are wrong in their judgment, it’s just their perception of you. Furthermore, what the other person should change is something we will not focus on, I will rather urge to learn to look at the brighter side. We should understand our own perspective better, try to figure out the things we love to see the most in other people, and then try to be more of that ourselves. Nurture these qualities, contemplate more about these moral values, water these thoughts and I am sure, that we will start becoming a better version of ourselves, as each day passes by. Moreover, this will also make us start liking everyone around us a little more, and will aid us to look at the world with hope and believe in the possibility of a better tomorrow.

I would also like to add, it’s okay to be a different person with different people rather it works the best for me that way. When I am on a trek I try to get my adventure mode on, when out for a live match screening the footballer in me switches on. Yes every person does see a slightly different side of me, everyone will have different opinions, but it does not really matter, because almost all of the judgment that you give and you get is mainly about superficial things in life. To elaborate the point further, if I am with a group who knows nothing about football, and I keep blabbering about it, they will have little to no interest in what I have to say, and in the same way, you come and talk about different web series or tv-series with me, I’ll not be able to pay attention even for five minutes. Also no, and I absolutely don’t mean to have multiple personalities, I am just saying that each one of us has a lot of things to offer to the world. We have had a tonne of experiences and we will keep having more, and hence I feel you should try to talk about things, share ideas which the other person can relate to. This ensures you connect with people a lot better and make bonds that last longer than a few hours. I’d sum up by saying, it’s just like turning that TV channel on, which the other person is interested in. By the way, there is a thin line between being the variable yourself and being the fake someone. You always need to remember you have to be you in all scenarios no matter what. Don’t imitate or don’t even in the slightest way try to be someone you are not, we are humans and none of us are liked by everyone. Some folks absolutely love Lionel Messi and others love Cristiano Ronaldo, but does Ronaldo ever try to become more of what Messi is, just so the whole world loves him, absolutely not. Everyone has to be at peace with themselves, no one needs to add or delete a quality, just because the world likes that better. Rather the first person you have to please is yourself. Add the channels, the qualities you want to live by and delete the ones you know are the wrong ones that hinder your progress. It’s not important for you to have all the channels, it is more important, that the ones you have are good and are becoming better.

Photo by Elena Taranenko on Unsplash

Lastly, understanding perception and my own perspective have helped me be a lot less judgemental, it has made me more accepting of varied humans and cultures. I am now able to think rationally about things once I thought were taboo, it has helped me at depth realize different views as well as different realities, it has helped me be more empathetic and connect with people better, it has also helped me evaluate situations at a level where I can understand the cause and effect, but most importantly it has made me a better individual. So now every time I look at things and feel disappointed, I try to go within and ask can I look at this from a different perspective?

To end I’d say

“Beauty is in the eye of the beholder”

Thank you for taking the time out to read this, and if you want to ever talk about life in general, or have suggestions about my article drop a comment below. You can also reach out to me on Telegram or LinkedIn.

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Bhavya Mehta

Bhavya Mehta

Web3 Developer | Freelancer | Writing my heart out here