“bro, get real”
according to urban dictionary, telling someone to “get real” screams “get a reality check and stop behaving as though you’re living in a fantasy world” (s/o to Guest, September 08 2005)
it’s 2017 and teens who reflect on the world are told to “lighten up” and “have fun” by their peers. relationships aren’t seen as commitments but rather as a way to screw around and get some physical satisfaction.
it’s 2017 and being emotional is seen as a weakness rather than a strength.
Why do we try to please people around us by hiding the real within us?
and i’m not talking about the workplace.
i’m talking about how we forget the fact that we are humans with a crap ton of emotions, and how we’re uncomfortable sharing them since we’re scared of being judged.
emotions aren’t something we can help. it’s not like we can count the number and toss them in the microwave on HIGH, and then stuff them back in the fridge when we’re done. they’re a natural part of us. and like we’re starting to accept the various characteristics of our human species (i.e. body hair, etc.), it’s high time we welcome emotions as a strength into our progressive society.
emotions are real. they’re more real than the motivational quotes and the fake positive attitude you try to pull on when you breakup. the “fake it till you make it” principle may help you get through a week with your coworkers, but suppressing your emotions from friends and family isn’t going to help you heal.
and that’s where the whole “fake” vs. “real” comes in.
a fake individual will leave as soon as you show yourself to be anything other than positive and happy. when you show them raw emotion and a flurry of rants, they’ll find you unattractive and definitely not fun. perhaps fun was all they were looking for, maybe they thought you would be their clown. heck, they’d probably even criticize you, tell you to stop being such a weakling, and “deal with it” by yourself. sharing with someone you know is bound to dismiss your emotions is just setting yourself up to feel worse.
on the other hand, a real individual will stick around, trying to understand you and your perspective. they try to help, sometimes providing their own insight or just listening to you. either way, they’re gems that are hard to come by.
if humans were supposed to be loners and deal with absolutely everything by ourselves, we wouldn’t have been so big on the concept of family and friends.
i’m not saying dump your problems onto the shoulders of everyone around you, but expressing your bottled-up emotions on a certain issue isn’t going to harm anyone.
and if we were all to embrace our emotions, would our emotions still be seen as a weakness?
we tell children that “sharing is caring”, but as we grow older, the things we share remain constricted to the physical. if we all take a step back and realize that we all have emotions and it’s completely okay to share them, it can lead to better mental health for everyone.
we are all working towards a bigger, better society. but we fail to realize that all the change we wish to create can be accelerated within an inclusive society, a society inclusive in all aspects, whether it be race or emotions.
so look around for a few humans. go for a coffee, share some raw emotion.
have a philosophical deep-ass conversation for 2 hours. talk about problems, issues, even world issues. listen to what the person on the other side has to say. talk, listen, connect.
if they can handle it, you’ve found one gem out of a rare few. keep them close, stay connected. put some effort into your friendship, they’ll be there when you need them the most.