Leveraging Your Perception — the Dangers of Your Past and Future

I remember graduating high school vividly. The class president had finished up saying something gaudy and predictable, before taking a selfie of the congregation and seating herself back down. The tassels slid over. The hats soared in the air and some Top 40 song signaled the start of the fireworks show.

But the most seminal moment of that evening came when turning to my good friend during the chaos and cheering. We were both teary-eyed, but for completely different reasons. While I was relieved, he was in mourning.

I can’t remember what I said to him. But I remember feeling a great sense of entitlement. I thought so low of my friend for being sad at graduation. I felt that he was obsessing with living in the past, while my eyes were set towards the true prize — the future.

I was wrong.

I had spent my time in high school staring out of class windows, longing for distant places and new experiences. I kept my head low and ignored those around me. I passed up the daily opportunities that presented themselves to me. I turned down those who wanted to get to know me. I never talked to the redhead in my broadcasting class I couldn’t stop staring at.

The choice to live in a future that didn’t exist sacrificed the present that I had.

It’s a character trait that rears itself far too often in my life. And learning to leverage my perspective has been crucial to finding success in all aspects of my life.

We’ve been encouraged to be forward-thinking. We’ve planned critically for colleges that would accept us or deny us based on a few sets of numbers. We’ve sacrificed present enjoyment in order to bolster our savings accounts or invest money for the future. We’re trying to be good people.

But the problem comes when you’ve stopped preparing for a future and begun to live in it. When you’ve spent more of your free time looking into places you hope to be to than in opportunities that could help you get there.

Chances are, you’ve done this more than once. Who could blame you? The entire allure of the future is that it could be anything. It’s not limited to your hourly wage or your crappy hometown. It’s anything.

But perhaps you have the opposite problem. Maybe you’ve spent more time flipping through old photo albums than you have browsing tourism websites. Like my friend, you’ve chosen the past to live in. And while this past may be as real and as vivid to you as it was when you lived it, it’s no different than the idolization of the future.

Both are equally non-existent. The only difference is that one reality did exist at some point. Neither help you now.

We have a unique ability to exist autonomously. We’ve so readily able to bow our heads and grind at life without ever thinking about the fact that we’re actually living. The good news is, there also exists the opposite. Moments of epiphany while stuck on the expressway. The rhapsody of staring at the stars above. Rushing downstairs to tell your loved ones how much they mean to you.

Those moments of clarify? That’s now. That’s the realization that — in this present moment — you are alive.

Perhaps that sounds too esoteric. A bit heavy for an article on the internet. But I think it’s important to recognize that your perspective means the world for your productivity, satisfaction, and happiness. Just as much as a nostalgic person can let time pass them, can a forward-thinker neglect to capitalize on their present to plan for their future.

It’s what happened to me.

I’ve chosen to live a life without regrets — to be gentler on myself and more understanding that regretting the past only hurts me past a certain point. But if I were ever forced to admit things I desperately wished I could change, almost all of them would have to do with a lack of perspective. Choices I made thinking the future would bring me more than the past ever did. Thinking without clarity or insight.

Leveraging your perspective is crucial in succeeding in a world designed to distract you. There’s a million different ways to turn your brain off and let content flow in. And when you make that switch from active to passive, you begin to stop living for you and start living vicariously through others.

It’s the draw of social networks and sitcoms. It’s why Netflix binging is a thing.

I don’t want to advocate against social media or watching television every once in a while. Those tools are there for the use of everyone in the internet age. But there’s a fine line between enjoyment and escape.

If you let those sirens sing to you long enough, they’ll pull you under their spell.

So take a moment of clarity as often as you can. Leverage your exposure to what you know will distract you. But what’s more important is that you leverage your perspective. Don’t fetishize the future or idolize the past. Both paths lead to the same disappointment.

Oh, and if you’re still in high school — that person you’ve been meaning to ask out? They’ll end up at some private college a few states over anyway.

What have you got to lose?

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