The Only Whatever in the Room
I guess it is a feeling I should be used to by now. Being the only fill-in-the-blank in the room. The only woman. The only Latina. The only Native New Mexican. The only introvert. The only mom.
It seems like I’ve spent a lot of my life being the only whatever in the room. I don’t know why I keep ending up in these spaces. I like to think it is because I am such an interesting dynamic person. It’s probably more that I’m clueless, and I just go ahead and enter spaces that sound interesting without giving much thought to it until I’m in there and notice I’m an “other”. And then I just power through.
I’ve spent much of my life stumbling into rooms that were filled with people who do not look like me. Why do I keep ending up in these situations? Because I am ambitious and I want to do big things. I want to see the world. I want to make a difference. And powerful rooms don’t historically have a lot of people like me in them.
Those times that there has been someone like me, I’ve noticed it. I’ve been grateful and inspired by it. So I know it matters. I have to keep doing it even though I don’t always want to. Even though it would be easier to stay home.
So I keep doing it. Going into the rooms. Trying to talk over the loud voices hoping that someone will notice.