Home is where the heart is
Pliny The Elder
Where is your home? This question seeks to answer which place goes deepest inside you and not necessarily where did you spend most time in your life or where do you live at the moment.
For me, home is a work in progress. In my country I feel security definitely but I don’t feel I belong there completely. In other countries where I have traveled, I definitely felt that some are closer to me than others but still something is missing. What is it? Is home a matter of soil, architecture, economy? Many friends go to countries where they can find better money and better career.
When I think of home, I thing of my beloved friends, places where I had great time with people I love, places where I fell in love. I even think of my favorite songs that accompany me in every step and are there for me to keep me going.
I can’t think of any physical construction to name it home. So what is the common element here? Feelings, thus love. As the amazing lyrics of the Smiths song, one of the most influential songs of the 90s, from which the title of this article comes:
“Driving in your car
Oh, please don’t drop me home
Because it’s not my home, it’s their
home, and I’m welcome no more
And if a double-decker bus
Crashes into us
To die by your side
Is such a heavenly way to die”
When love is your home, then home is where you find love.
Another important element is, the place where you become yourself. Home might be where your parents are, might be where your partner is, but maybe not. If you don’t feel you can be yourself anywhere in this universe you go, then it’s not home. Where do you feel like you are free to unfold all the elements of your personality? It’s only by stopping movement that you finally are able to see. Only if you take a stop off your life and your environment you are able to see what you deeply care about. As writer Mark Matousek writes, “home is where we find our balance, the pivoting point that connects us to the heart.”
I have come to terms with the fact that I should stop seeking a new city or country anymore. I am a people’s person, I know that; if people don’t inspire me, if I can’t be open with them and if they can’t understand me and vice versa, the place no matter how beautiful it is, it cannot be my home.
So, when the quest for home comes, and you find yourself wandering around from place to place, you need to consider what matters to you, what is your truth.