Things Indian Parents Do To Their Kids That Mess With Their Heads Into Adulthood

Before proceeding with this post I want to inform this are the some of my personal experience. This are the points which are against Indian parents .

Trying to be their friend, not their parent.

“Social worker of 25 years here and I can tell you the number one thing is trying to be their friend not their parents. Kids need a calm authority figure to enforce rules and expectations, especially teenagers. Kids need to have reasonable boundaries and expectations and need to know that they will be enforced and that their behavior has repercussions.

Making negative comments about their appearance.

“Comment on their appearance/weight/body.

‘Suck in your stomach!’ ‘Shoulders back!’ ‘Why aren’t you wearing makeup? You know better than that! How are people supposed to notice you if you don’t look your best?’”

Shitting on their dreams.

“Shitting on their kids’ dreams.

‘Fuck doing what you love, son. Be a seafarer!’”

Failing to realize the world has changed since they were kids.

“Parents basing all their opinions on their own life experiences in life rather than considering that the world has changed since being their kid’s age.”

Comparing them to other kids, especially siblings.

“Comparing them to other kids, especially siblings.

No kid likes to hear ‘Why can’t you be more like so and so?’

It’s just so damaging. Your child is not so and so, they will never be so and so. Just help them along with being who they are.”

Never standing up for them.

“Never standing up for them”. Parents should stand for their kids when he is failing instead of comparing him with other kids and asking him to give up on his dreams or taunting him about not able to earn money at age of 20s or saying up when I was of 20 I did this and that.

Instilling their own fears into their kids.

“Instill their own insecurities and fears into their children. "Just because they failed at something they don't want their kids to do or even give a try to that thing.

Refusing to ever apologize or admit when they’re wrong.

“Refuse to apologize or admit when they’re wrong to their kids or to other people in front of their kids.

Your children will remember all the times you hurt their feelings and then tried to pretend like it never happened. They will remember the cashier you yelled at for a mistake that you made but wouldn’t say sorry for. They’ll either turn into an asshole or they’ll overcompensate and feel responsible for everything that goes wrong because you set a horrible example.”

Physically punishing them after they’ve admitted to an honest mistake.

“Physically punishing and screaming at your kid for fessing up to an honest mistake.

I accidentally broke a window when I was 5 and told the truth about it. I was promptly spanked pretty vigorously and sent to my room and told to stay in there.

What did I take away from that? Lie if it prevents you from getting into any sort of trouble. I was a pretty dishonest kid for years after that.”

Using them as an emotional dumping ground.

“Using your kids as an emotional dumping ground. My mom has always told me everything bad in her life.They will always use their emotional and melodramatic tone with their kids to force them to do the things which they dont like but they will do it just for the sake of their parents.

Never being able to give a compliment without wrapping it in an insult.

“No matter what achievements one makes, the parent relates it to a failure.

“Right now you only got job. But don't get happy we got this house for you with all hard work to maintain your status. You don't have this capability to do so.”

Stop it, its a request to all Mom and Dad. Last I checked I’m employed, not in debt, and going back to school while completely supporting myself. I’m doing pretty God damned well for someone of my age.”

Not Giving them much freedom.

“Giving a kid freedom as a teenager is key”. However, controlling their life at every part every phase of life will suffocate them. This will lead them to have hatred towards their own parents and they will start comparing their own parents with other parents.

Training them to be doormats.

“Train their kids to be doormats. Drop what you’re doing and do whatever I or any adult you know tells you to is a reasonable rule for a 5-year-old, but tons of parents continue to enforce that upon teenagers because it’s more convenient to them for their teenagers to be doormats, and then big shock, they grow up to be adult doormats, unable to stand up for themselves or even assert their own desires.”

Invading their privacy.

“Besides the obvious abusive answers, invading the kid’s privacy. My mom (along with many other parents) would read my texts sometimes and confront me about them. I never felt comfortable locking my door, it was always associated with being angry or spiteful. I didn’t even realize knocking was normal.

It kind of messed up my idea of privacy in relationships. Didn’t really think snooping was that wrong for a while.”

Overprotecting them.

“Overprotectiveness. Of course, there are always some things that need to be tightly watched around kids, but when you shield your child from every possible inconvenience they’ll end up either spoiled or overly dependent.”

You can drop your response in comment section if you like. You can leave you review on me ,this post also if you feel I am wrong or you feel bad about any of the points .