To Try, To Do, To Fail
When was the last time you felt like you were not good enough? Did it happen when you didn’t get the promotion you wanted? Or did it happen when you came in second place during a competition? We start feeling sorry for ourselves whenever we don’t get what we think we deserve.
But…
Don’t you think it’s time we stop feeling sorry for ourselves for our predicament? It’s time to own up to the choices that we make. From the food, we eat to the company we surround ourselves with. These are choices which are within our control. Surely, we can’t choose what happens to us but we can choose how we react to whatever happens to us.
As I approach the age where most would coin as a quarter life crisis, where an individual is confused about his/her career path; contemplating whether to migrate to a foreign country to teach English or to climb the corporate ladder. All of these are big choices and either one could have a huge impact on mylife, be it emotionally or financially.
Unlike other millennials who are torn between their quarter life crisis. I feel liberated from such a dilemma. It wasn’t because I had life figured out from the get-go. I was just as confused as most would in their early twenties. But the only difference was that I went on a quest to find out what I enjoyed, while others are contemplating whether they should even try. Instead of feeling sorry for myself for being clueless, I went out there to put myself in uncomfortable situations, to try, to do and to fail.
To try
I did not wake up one day knowing what was important to me. I only knew that if I did not try what I thought was important, I will never find out. For example, I knew that starting a podcast required me to change my speaking habits, which made me very uncomfortable. Eventually, I did it because either it will feel right or it won’t and I won’t know unless I jump in and find out. And it has been one of the best choices I made so far because I did not know I would enjoy having a conversation so much. It was only after I tried that the podcast would be something that mattered to me. When I was contemplating whether to give up and try teaching English overseas, it was a no brainer because I found something which gave me enjoyment and fulfillment. Which is the answer to a quarter life crisis, a purposeful life.
To do
I did not want to be in the bleachers anymore and neither did I want to be on the substitutes bench, I wanted to be in the game. I was tired of feeling sorry for myself when I looked at others achieving success. I knew that if I wanted to get my hand raised, I had to put in the work. There were definitely times when I felt like giving up the podcast because I doubted myself when I did not see progress. But ironically, the journey to improvement was actually what made it enjoyable. Because progression has to be one of the best feelings one can ever feel.
To fail
In the past, I hated the taste of defeat, it left a sour taste in my mouth. I remembered feeling such a loser when I had to see my opponent celebrate in my face when I lost my first Brazilian Jiu-jitsu competition. I would have kicked him had I not felt so exhausted. However, when I reflected on the loss, I felt like I won even though I lost. Firstly, that was my time that I ever participated in a competition. Secondly, I did not tap out despite being caught in a triangle choke. Thirdly, it was the hardest I ever fought in my life, I pushed my body beyond the limit that I went into fatigue the next day. And all the over things that could improve my jiu-jitsu game. It was through failing that I knew what it takes to succeed.
“The moral of the story is, you only get one life. So do it all. “- Bobby Axelrod, Billions S2
With that in mind, the only thing stopping us from doing anything is ourselves. If we are too afraid to even try, how will we ever know what we enjoy doing? It is time to stop feeling sorry ourselves and start trying, start doing and start failing.
