Weird Things I do When I’m Depressed

People have different things that they do to deal with all of this… meaning life. After such a disappointing election, I find myself reaching for my coping mechanisms, and I do some weird things.

Here are the 3 things I do when I go on full-escapism mode:

1) I Watch YouTube Vlogs

I’ll watch anything that’s on food/nutrition, hair, tutorials, skits, and panels. I can spend all day doing this, because when you click on one thing, YouTube suggests other videos you might be interested in — and I’m always interested in more. It’s kind of ridiculous.

There’s really no limit to the madness. I’m not a vegan, but for whatever reason I spent last weekend immersed in the crazy within the vegan vlogger community, and that shit is hilarious. Forget Real Housewives of Atlanta, or whatever reality TV people watch — the real drama is among the vegan peeps.

2) I Daydream A lot — A.K.A Maladaptive Daydreaming

The term maladaptive daydreaming is fairly new in psychology, and it’s not even fully recognized, but I’ve been doing this shit ever since I was a kid. In a nutshell, it’s elaborate daydreaming that involves intricate world building. When I try to explain this to people, they always wonder the difference between that, and regular daydreaming. Maladaptive daydreamers are so good at designing their world that it’s like being lost in a book or movie with fleshed-out characters and plot lines. The characters in this alternative world feel like family.

However, a few other things that distinguish maladaptive daydreamers:

• According to Dr. Eli Somer (the guy who’s responsible for bringing the subject to the spotlight), the average person spends 16% of their day daydreaming, while maladaptive daydreamers spend upwards 57% of their time in an alternative world.
• 80% of maladaptive daydreamers use kinesthetic activity or movement when daydreaming, such as rocking, pacing or spinning. This is also known as self-stimulatory behavior, or stimming, which is most commonly seen within the autistic community. I personally run up and down while snapping my fingers and/or hitting the wall.
• It’s normal to laugh, cry, make facial gestures and respond to things happening in the alternative world.

The kinesthetic activity and reactions happen when I am overcome by the things concurring in my imaginary universe that it manifests itself into the outside world. However, I don’t usually realize what I am doing until I’m in the middle of it, and something forces me to become self-aware, like the phone ringing. It’s freaking weird.

For those hearing about this for the first time, fear not — maladaptive daydreamers know the difference between reality and fantasy. Chances are, if you’ve met one, you wouldn’t really know it because at most they might come off as spacey, but they’re not doing the stuff listed above for the world to see. For some people, the habit has caused interference in their life, but for others like myself, it is used strategically as a coping device. If you want to know more — you can watch some YouTube videos about it — haha!

3) I have full-blown philosophical conversations with myself

I will literally have a conversation with the air about some idea I heard on NPR, or something I read on the internet. The air responds. Yes I usually imagine a question, or some sort of opposing view being thrown at me for which I come up with a response — hence making it a back-and-forth conversation.

Conclusion

As strange as these things maybe, at least I’m not doing crack or going all kleptomania every time I’m down. I also do some normal things to feel better like read, write, exercise, cook, talk to friends, family — and all that good stuff. But I’d be lying if I didn’t admit that the the things above have saved me from going under more times than I can count.

What are some of the weird things you do to make it through hard times?