1:1s — What They Are and Why You Should Be Hosting Them

Tough to get right but absolutely essential for any company out there

Meetings. Love ’em or hate ’em, they’re still an integral part of any company or business. And yes, we’ve all been a part of meetings that should’ve been an email instead, but 1:1s should a) never be an email and b) should never be optional.

Let’s start with what a 1:1 meeting is. Essentially, it is an informal one-on-one get together between a manager and their direct report, the keyword being informal. This is important because there’s a very distinct difference between a one-on-one meeting for the purpose of project management and talking business and 1:1s that are meant to check in and solve other overarching issues that might arise from more personal sources.

Now, it might seem counterintuitive to get a bit personal at work and to have a chat with your subordinate that’s not strictly work-related, but here’s the thing- it matters when you show an interest in the overall well-being of your employees. No one expects you to dive into each other’s life stories and get into the nitty-gritty of it, but staying aware of what’s happening with them and how that might consequently affect their work is super important.

With the COVID19 pandemic and all the changes it brought with it, 1:1s are more essential than ever. They can really boost morale and increase employee engagement, which in turn allows a better company culture, employee retention rates and career development to flourish. And trust me, you want to retain your employees- a study by the Society for Human Resource Management found that employers spend upwards of 6–9 months salary to hire and train a new replacement.

Not only that, your team morale will certainly take a hit if you have to let someone go. If a 1:1 can solve problems before they become an issue too big to fix, you’re saving yourself a lot of time, money and other precious resources.

1:1s are not limited to any one industry or a particular level of management. All managers should be hosting them, and they should be hosting them regularly. The issue is that a poorly planned 1:1 will not bear the kind of results that make a tangible difference and that’s what we’re here to answer- the question of how to host an effective 1:1. Let’s dive right in:

The Agenda and What To Include in It

Having an agenda for ANY meeting is an absolute necessity. It keeps things on track, allows for everyone to add their own points beforehand and gives people a chance to prepare in advance. The same applies to 1:1 meetings. Additionally, by adding relevant information, it can help set the tone for the meeting and manage expectations on both ends.

Be sure to create the agenda on a collaborative platform so your direct report can add their own points. After all, the direct report is the real star of the show- this meeting is a way for them to voice their concerns and talk about what’s happening and how to make things better. Make sure to send it 24–48 hours before the meeting and refer to it during the meeting. You can make edits to the general format of the agenda based on how the meetings go and what you observe about those interactions.

There are no set standards for what a meeting agenda should look like, but the bare minimum includes timings for each section, the primary topics to discuss, any additional notes and a section at the end to jot down any action items.

Location, Location, Location

It’s hard to be candid and slightly more informal when you’re still present in the office environment. A 1:1 is the perfect opportunity to step out and get some fresh air. Go on a walk while you chat, or grab a coffee at a nearby café.

The change in environment will make it easier for you to interact in a more casual manner while simultaneously putting your employee at ease and letting them be more honest and upfront. There also won’t be any scrutiny from their coworkers and the presence of other pressures that might exist in the office setting.

Consistency Is Key

Updates become meaningless if you don’t follow up and host the 1:1 sessions regularly. A one-off will never give you the desired results. On the other hand, scheduling these meetings to be a regular occurrence at a predetermined interval will not only let you stay up-to-date with the happenings of your direct report, but it will also make them feel valued and heard. This, of course, helps with employee retention and overall satisfaction.

Basically, consistency will pay huge dividends in the future, so keep at it. Do not cancel these sessions- opt to reschedule if you must, but cancellation should be the last possible resort. 1:1 sessions are important, so you need to treat them as such. If you act like they’re optional, that’s what they’ll become, and you lose the endless benefits of forming a strong, trust-filled bond with your employee that guarantees them putting their best foot forward at work.

It’s an investment of time and a very worthy one at that.

Set the Right Tone

1:1s are meant to be a time for the direct report to speak candidly about their duties, concerns, and their career goals, which means you need to be ready to listen more than you speak. There could be some awkward pauses during the meeting, especially within the initial few interactions, but instead of filling up the silence with small talk, opt to look at the agenda and bring up one of their other points. To take a more personal route and make them more comfortable, feel free to share an anecdote of your own and get the conversation going on track again.

Be honest and tell them to voice out any criticisms and observations and receive them graciously. And above all, keep track of your body language because it’s important. Keep your posture open and receptive- avoid crossing your arms across your chest or stiffening your shoulders. People pick up on subtle cues subconsciously and are more likely to be tense themselves.

For online 1:1s, insist on turning the camera on so that you can see each other and make the experience more personal and life-like. It’s a good way to show them that you’re not on your phone and you’re paying full attention to them. Also, don’t forget to both start and end your 1:1 sessions on a positive note. Even if the discussion takes a heavier tone, end the conversation with some positive affirmation and set some tangible action items for the upcoming meeting.

Understand the Difference Between Project Management and 1:1s

As mentioned earlier, there’s a huge difference between talking business with someone and actually listening to all their concerns and questions in a 1:1. The rule of thumb is this- do not lead the discussion towards projects or tasks. If the direct report does, you are free to talk about it but try to remind them that this time is meant for them to talk about anything weighing on them and to discuss what’s working and what can be better.

Your direct report sees things from a different perspective, so their observations are a valuable resource that can allow you to approach any issue in a more holistic, well-rounded manner.

1:1 meetings can seem daunting because you are forced to tread a fine line, but once you get the hang of them, hosting effective 1:1 meetings can do wonders for your relationship with your direct report and consequently, their relationship to their job and the company. Keep at them, learn from each meeting, and find a balance that fits your team the best!

Thank you for reading!

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