Empathy as an inherent part of employee experience management

In business, empathy helps to build the best relationships between employees and serves a catalyst for innovative tasks. The better a leader understands the moods, concerns and needs of the team members, the more qualitative are the results they can achieve. In this article Ani Kocharyan, leader of the Change Experience Design practice at Innovation Culture, and Anastasia Totok — representative of the Presencing Institute and Theory U in Russia will share simple tools, which they’ve learnt from working with the leaders of HR community, for developing the above mentioned skill. All the tools lie in the area of two methodologies: design thinking and Theory U.

These tips will be useful both for line managers and for HR specialists who are going to manage employee experience or already do that in their organization.

Note.

Theory U is a methodology for change management based on the vision of the desired future in which we want to live. Its founder is Otto Scharmer, PhD in economics and management, senior lecturer at the Massachusetts Institute of Technology, co-founder of the Presencing Institute. Theory U is based on three principles: open mind (curiosity), open heart (empathy) and open will (courage).

Design thinking is a method of designing innovative products and services and is purposed to determine and meet key users’ challenges. Opposite to analytical thinking, the peculiar feature of design thinking is not critical analysis, but rather a creative process in which even the most unexpected ideas lead to best solutions. The basic principle of this methodology is human-centered approach. This is the approach in which human experience, human states, worries, concerns, and the context are considered in the first place.

Tools

In order to create a comfortable and productive environment in a company, primarily it is necessary to know the opinion of employees. The most trivial option is talking to them — we call it “exploring their experience in the company”.

From a first glance everything may seem clear but there’s obscure nuances. During our research, we often found out that people aren’t ready to say what they actually think. It could be that they fear to be misunderstood, fear to offend and disappoint others, or a person just lacks time to give an answer and ends up saying the first thing that comes to mind. If we’re determined to know what interlocutors really think, we need to possess two skills:

1. The ability to create trust in a dialogue to make the interlocutor feel free and safe;
2. To listen to the interlocutor without interrupting, imposing our own point of view, judging his or her words and contemplations.

Theory U suggests several instruments for developing these skills.

The first skill is generative listening.
Being able to listen to the other person’s story in a non-judgmental, sincere, open and curious way is a fundamental skill which helps us to understand a person’s true intentions.
For this, we use a skill of switching between 4 levels of listening. The level and the quality of listening depend on where the listener’s attention is at the moment: on himself, on the interlocutor, or on the result you want to achieve at the end of the talk.

1 level. All the attention is centered inside ourselves and we don’t notice the position and opinion of the interlocutor, we are just technically listening to his answers. Often, the higher the position of a manager is, the more frequently he/she will hear socially expected answers from employees.

2 level. Ego-system: an argument or debate. Attention is on the edge of your consciousness, and you begin to notice your interlocutor, but the only thing that concerns you on this level is to prove your point of view. You’re not ready to hear the interlocutor and to uncover his/her/their real motives. You are in the opposition with your interlocutor.

3 level. Empathic listening. Your attention and interest are concentrated on what your interlocutor is saying. On this level curiosity arises towards what’s going on between you two. Not only do you listen carefully to the words but we also read between the lines to sense the person’s state.

4 level. Generative listening. We shift our attention to the moment in the future when we have successfully realized the project already. While talking, we’re trying to follow each other ideas, completing and clarifying what has been said. This level is characterized by a great flow of energy from the emergence of something new — new solutions, ideas and insights which didn’t exist before your talk.

It is essential for a researcher to switch quickly to the third level, empathic listening. The co-author of this article, Ani Kocharyan, leader of the Change Experience Design practice at Innovation Culture, has three lifehacks for that:
1. Imagine that you’re Alice in Wonderland looking for the white rabbit. The white rabbit in this case, is the answer, the thought and the constant search for the true intentions of your interlocutor.
2. After each answer ask “Why?”. It will help to figure out the true intentions, desires, needs, fears and expectations of the interlocutor.
3. During a dialogue, trace every moment when you acquire a wish whether that is to comment on interlocutor’s remarks or give advice; restrain yourself and tick such impulses on paper. When the talk is over, turn back to that paper, count the ticks and praise yourself for not descending to the first two levels.

However, conducting an interview is only a part of the process, and preparing for it is of the utmost importance. Here another tool from Theory U, Social Presencing Theater (SPT), will come in use, the author of which is Arawana Hayashi, the co-founder of Presencing Institute.

SPT is a practice in which the main tool for activating your best condition is your body. It allows you, first of all, get your mind right before an empathic interview. We can’t physically “get into the skin” of another person, but we are able to set up our bodies in such a way that we’ll hear person’s feelings and worries as our own. So, if a person is sad, we’ll feel sorrow; if a person feels pain or joy, we will, like mirrors, reflect and see these feelings in ourselves. The cleaner the mirror is, the brighter and more comprehensible is the image, which means the better your sensitivity is developed, the easier it is for you to get the feelings of another person and the higher is your empathy.

Practical experience shows that the main tool in empathic research is the researcher.Thus, the result of a talk depends on what state you are in while having it. A researcher needs to understand his/her/their emotional and physical state, which can create space for an open and trustworthy dialogue.

In addition, it’s necessary to take into account the fact that any tension or restraint will impede an open and trustworthy dialogue. That’s why we offer two simple practices for turning empathy on and quick tuning in with the body. The ultimate purpose is to feel the state and the mood here and now:

1. Breath directing your attention to the belly. Set the alarm for 2 minutes, and during this time breath as usual but do not take your attention from the belly swelling when you inhale and deflating when you exhale.
2. In order to relax quickly and direct the attention back into the body, first, tighten it up. Shrink as much as possible, close your eyes, tighten your jaw and fists. Stay like this for a couple of seconds, then relax sharply, and totally release tension. Repeat this three times, while standing. After that stretch well and shake your body as if shaking off dust. This simple exercise helps to restart blood and lymph circulation, and also to get rid of useless anxiety and tune in to a conversation.

These simple exercises will let you easily and quickly calm a restless mind and focus on your interlocutor during an emphatic interview.

In our work we combine two approaches: design thinking and Theory U. The juxtaposition of these two methodologies, and not the selection of one and only “right” approach, allows us to figure out and to meet tough business challenges.

In this article, we have consciously analyzed the tools specifically for developing empathy, since this very quality establishes the ground for creating and managing employee experience. Successful companies know from their own experience that the well-being and engagement of employees directly affects the achievement of business goals.

Authors:

Ani Kocharyan — head of Sales&Success, leader of the Change Experience Design practice at Innovation Culture.

Anastasia Totok — representative of the Presencing Institute and Theory U in Russia, business concultant.