The Surprising Power of NO
This one is for the influencers…
This may just end up being a rant… but I’ll try to make it as productive as possible.
If you’re interesting in building relationships and ongoing partnerships, take a “yes, and…” approach to your no: “no, but…”; “no, because…”; or even “no, unless…”
A good ‘no’ can offer a solution.
Any partnership is a give and take, right? In influencer marketing it’s great when both sides get what they want. It happens! But it’s not always possible.
I’m all about empowering influencers. That’s what I strive to do. I believe in the power of everyday people telling stories on their terms. I believe that blogs, Instagram, and their ilk have changed marketing and advertising forever.
I get that so many influencers don’t have anyone advocating on their behalf, have to be their own business managers, and are rightfully wary of being taken advantage of. It’s a challenging circumstance that I don’t take lightly.
It’s obviously everybody’s right to say ‘no’ to anything at any given time, but at the same time I’ve been marinating on just how unproductive and off-putting an aggressive, unqualified ‘no’ can be.
I’m really trying to explain this without going into specifics — the last thing I want to do is have some feel like they’ve been called out. But basically, I had a misunderstanding with an influencer wherein I asked her to do something, and the response I got was a paragraph long version of a HELL NO. I could see where she was coming from, but her response didn’t help me solve my problem.
Due to a miscommunication, we had been expecting an Instagram post from her whereas she had no intention of posting one. THAT’S FINE. But then she read me the riot act when what I really could have used was her saying either:
a) No I’m not going to post in the Instagram feed but I’ll post a story
b) No I’m not going to post, because my editorial calendar is full
c) No I won’t post on Instagram unless you increase my compensation
Honestly, just anything to flesh out the ‘no’. Give me something to work with. Help me help you! Because ultimately I’m not in charge — the client is. When you give me an unqualified, unequivocal ‘no’, I lose any leverage I had to advocate for you. It’s also a missed opportunity on your part to clarify your boundaries. Communicate both what you can and cannot do, and why.
Tell me your stop and I’ll try to get you there. But I can’t help you if you refuse the ride.
Moreover — and I’ve spent nearly 350 words trying to find a delicate way to put this — it makes people not want to work with you. An unproductive ‘no’ isolates you from the people who want to give you work and reads as a rejection of the partnership. Think about it: as an influencer would you feel confident about a business relationship if the other party drew a hard line when you needed flexibility?
