As I Mature, My Circle of Friends Gets Smaller
But My Chest of Wisdom Grows Bigger
Is this really what maturing means?
I think it is.
The more I age, the more I come to learn who are the people who value me as a person. It probably makes sense because as time passes, we experience more challenges in life that validate genuine friends.
I value my friends. I used to have a good number of them with whom I shared countless breakfasts, lunches, dinners, and “house raids” during birthdays and holidays. Whenever someone feels like going out, you can bet that everyone, or most, will be there to join. Those were fun and happy days.
Life, however, as it is, doesn’t work as an endless loop of happy moments. It offers us circumstances we may not want to happen but had to happen. They are parts of our lives that make us stronger as an individual.
Sadly, some of my friends left to go overseas, following the path of life they planned and perhaps their destiny. Friendship doesn’t end there, though. Thanks to social media which made it possible to get in touch with them quickly. Life is still good, knowing that they never forget me. I learned that it’s not the nearness that matters in a friendship, but the sincerity and care that you have for one another.
As life goes, however, tests of true friendship came along the way, at least between myself and a friend who I got to see from time to time and with whom I used to share happy moments. With this friend, I learned that friendship might not be a two-way street after all. It was heartbreaking to know that you value someone and what you get in return are dishonest and selfish acts — precisely, lies that tarnish you as a person in the eyes of another friend.
It was a friendship taken for granted. But then again, life goes on.
Despite everything, I don’t keep a grudge against those who do me wrong, especially those who I used to value. I guess I am in that stage of life where I understand and accept this one fact— we can’t please everyone. Trust and friendship were lost, in honesty. Nevertheless, I take the experience as one of the colorful chapters of my life.
As I mature, my circle of friends may get smaller. But my chest of wisdom grows bigger. When someone chooses not to be a genuine part of your life, it only fits that we must let go. I felt relieved when I did. Strangely, my life felt lighter. I felt happier knowing that the remaining friends I have are those with genuine hearts.
There is a saying that when a door closes, a window opens. I believe in this. A door of friendship may have closed for some, but a window opens for another. That other one was no one else but me.
With lesser friends, I have more time for myself and the chance to know the kind of person I am. I am not saying that fewer friends are better. But because most of my remaining friends have families of their own, with husbands and kids to take care of, spending time with them isn’t as often as I used to with my single friends. I am fine, however. Even better. Because I enjoy the independence that I never knew I am capable of when my “fun and happiness” used to be dependent on being with friends. That, I guess, is what they call maturity.
Life offers us endless experiences. Some may be good, and some may be bad. As for the latter, I believe that there is always something good in every bad. We only have to always look on the positive side. Life hands us events that we can’t control. But we can in the way we react. In my experience, it makes a difference in living a beautiful life.
