Three Kinds of People Everyone Meets in Life
How to Identify the most valuable from the three
“Shared joys make a friend, not shared sufferings” — Friedrich Nietzsche
Every person we meet is unique — with their qualities and flaws — and we tend to attract and be attracted to those who match our personality type. The rest are eventually driven away when their values, thoughts, and actions are not in harmony with ours anymore.
But before leaving, they do their part of the damage to our lives. That’s why you should learn how to read people and how to prevent at least a few of those from coming into your life in the first place.
Having said that, here are the three kinds of people you’ll meet in your life from this point forward:
Type 1: Those who leave you when you’re down on your knees
Everyone faces ups and downs in life and so will you. You’ll also come across those people who run away at the first sight of trouble they see heading your way.
When you start bleeding, metaphorically, many people leave who you never thought would. You’ll be hurt, and when you are hurting, it’s tough to see who is there for you and who isn’t. But these types of people, no matter how much you trust them, are sure as hell not worthy of your time and trust. You’ll learn this the hard way.
They may have their reasons and valid reasons to leave you, but if they are not there to cry with you, they are not worthy of laughing with you either or even watch you laugh with your friends from the distance.
When this happens, don’t be too hard on yourself for sometimes a good heart doesn’t see the bad.
“The saddest thing about betrayal is that it never comes from your enemy”
Always remember, There are no conditions in friendship and where there are conditions, ifs, and buts, it’s not friendship. It’s just business. When the good time comes back and believe me, it will, I advise you to keep the relationship with such people like a businessman: ‘formal and impersonal’.
Type 2: Those who don’t leave you when you’re down on your knees
When one goes through bad times, there are a few family and friends who stand by you all along. The great Indian philosopher Chanakya says,
‘ There is some self-interest behind every friendship. This is the bitter truth’
This means when the time itself permits leaving you high and dry and someone still stays, they may have some self-interest which is yet unfulfilled.
Despite adverse circumstances, they choose to stay with you.
Why would a person stay along a dry well? Unless he wants to steal the bricks for his own house.
I admire the people in list one for their honesty. At least they are honest with themselves. They know that you are a sinking ship and they jump as soon as they can. They see you incapable of any further use and they throw you away in a heartbeat.
You have to be aware of the people who do not leave you when everyone does.
Now make no mistake, there will be genuine people in this list too who would take a bullet for you before anything happens to you. But it’s hard to identify those among sheep in wolf ‘s clothing.
For example, If you are struggling financially, a person whom you owe money and a real friend, both will tell you that these are tough times, hold on, it’ll pass and they both will stay by your side all the way. But do you think both of them are your well-wisher?
Some people stand by you because they feel bound by blood relations. They show they are with you but… they don’t help either. They are just there so that this society doesn’t question them.
“A real friend will be there for you even when he has all the reasons in the world to leave you”- Shikhar
Type 3: Those who come to you the first time when you’re beaten down:
“Only when life gets too real are you able to see the fake people” — Shikhar
These are the kind who are worth keeping in your life as well as in your memories.
Sometimes, they come because of the empathy they feel for you.
Everyone can see the tears, but not everyone is ready to defile their fingers wiping someone else’s face. It takes courage to lend a handkerchief to someone at such times. Furthermore, it is hard to show support to anyone who has been rejected even by those who were always around him when he was on the top.
Our pseudo-moral society doesn’t appreciate anyone talking to the one who has been ostracised without besmirching the good name the former carries. Society will label them with the same names they labeled you with once they go against its informal dictate of leaving you stranded during bad times.
These kinds of people are gold, no pure gold. They sometimes put their reputation on the line when they choose to stand with someone with whom no one is standing. They do not judge the fallen by his present situation. They have the courage to not be judgmental and, at the same time, not follow the crowd. They dare to stand against the prevalent social order because they understand that after all, the one who is down is a human and it is just a matter of time that he will be back up. This is what’s called ‘believing’ in someone.
It’s very hard to put the money on a horse who just lost the race. But the one who puts it anyways is not only taking chances but also making a statement that he believes in him.
Next time you’re kicked down by life, look out for such amazing souls. They are very rare and hard to identify when your time is right. Only when you’re left with no one by your side, you can see these people walk to you with a big step which itself says, ‘ I believe in you’ and they accept you for who you are. Moreover, they’d never overstep their bounds. They let you get back up on your own.
“A real friend is the one who believes in you even when you cease to believe in yourself”
When someone comes to you when hopelessness is apparent, helplessness is self-evident and without your asking for help, my advice is: Never let’em go!
