It is not hopeless to hope
It’s interesting yet emotional to read insights of women suffering domestic violence and post-natal depression amongst many other disorders, but unfortunately this is the sad reality of many women around the world.
It’s hard to be there for someone suffering these disorders, because there is no simple solution to supporting someone with a mental illness — how you care for someone can depend on you and the person you care for. It can help to understand the disorder, and how it affects the person you care for. But you must also make sure you look after your own self and wellbeing, by not taking on too much or overwhelming the sufferer.
Offering to listen does not mean you have to say much back, they may find it helpful to know that you are there to listen. Don’t be afraid in asking how they are feeling and asking if you can do anything to help. Encourage them to find positives and to be independent (this could be taking part in everyday activities or a simple relaxation technique) as well as making an emergency plan just in case things don’t go to plan.
It is good for a believer to have an attitude that is optimistic, being hopeful and confident in the future, so try to stay positive whilst you support others. There are many verses in the Qur’an that remind us to not despair. When you have Allah, you have everything so do not fear so greatly that you end up forgetting to remain hopeful,
“Be not sad (or afraid), surely Allah is with us.” Then Allah sent down His Sakinah (calmness, tranquillity, peace, etc.) upon him, and strengthened him with forces (angels) which you saw not.”
It may be that this test of yours is a means of purification and relief will come in ways you cannot fathom because Allah’s plan is always the best of plans. We have to remember that there are certain things that Allah has destined for us which will occur no matter how well prepared we are. And if He has destined this for us at a point and time, we must take it as a reminder and as a lesson to better ourselves. So whatever happens, it can truly only benefit us. That is what Islam teaches its believers.
“The more you have good expectations of your Lord and hope in Him, the more you will rely on and trust in Him…”
“And He will provide him from (sources) he never could imagine. And whosoever puts his trust in Allah, then He will suffice him.”
Allah is As-Shaafi (The Healer) and may He heal all those suffering whether that be physically, mentally or spiritually. Ameen.
“Allaahumma Rabb an-naas, mudhhib al-ba’s ishfi anta al-Shaafi, laa shaafiya illa anta, shifaa’an laa yughaadir saqaman (O Allah, Lord of mankind, the One Who relieves hardship, grant healing, for there is no healer but You, a healing that leaves no trace of sickness).”
Narrated by al-Bukhaari (5750) and Muslim (2191).
There may be some bad days and some good days but perseverance is key. Do not lose hope in Al-Lateef (The Subtle, Discreet, Gentle in His actions and decree).
“Verily, with the hardship, there is relief (i.e. there is one hardship with two reliefs, so one hardship cannot overcome two reliefs).”
We want you to remember and understand you are important and there are people who are willing to help, Inspirited Minds is also here for you — getting better can take time. It may be hard to feel a sense of stability when everything feels like it is crashing down and you have to “stay strong” but it’s ok to sometimes fall down, because you can and will pick yourself up and when you do you will be stronger than before bi’ithnillah (with the permission of Allah).
Maybe not in the same way as women, but men usually feel they are the ones who have to be the strong ones and also suffer from mental health issues. It may not be discussed as much as women and mental health however, is it not time to also shed some light on this?
Originally published at inspiritedminds.org.uk on December 31, 2015.
Hamida Moulvi | Inspirited Minds | Public Relations Officier
Hamida has a BSc (Hons) Psychology degree, having studied modules concerning Emotions and Mental Health. She is passionate about giving back to the community as it is important to benefit others — every little helps, in inspiring changes and raising awareness, especially within Muslim communities where many cultures can believe mental health isn’t a real problem. She has a love for the way Islam guides, inspires and heals (HasbunAllahu w ni’mal wakeel) and is also interested in languages, being multilingual. She believes words have a powerful impact whether that be in written or spoken form, and that we are all here to learn, implement and share so helping write articles would achieve this also.