7.2 Reflections: Overcoming Procrastination
I could have, but was unable, to complete prototyping and obtain more user feedback before leaving New York City. My project supervisor highlighted this, and pointed out that I was “drifting” from topic to topic (ranging from exploring digital altruism to using music to promote social integration) during every check-in with her, unable to settle on a more specific research area. She prompted me to reflect about it and learn from the experience. She indicated that part of having a Masters education was about self-discovery too — it was probably a more important experience than performing the design process.
“Drift” was the keyword that left a lasting impression on me. I wondered whether I had become lazy.
I adopted Gibb’s reflective cycle (The Open University, 2015), which provided a simple but effective framework for conducting reflections.
What happened which affected me most?
Thinking back, I encountered many challenges initially in New York City (NYC). I arrived in NYC hoping to secure a paid internship and possibly a job as well. I attended the Service Design Global Conference and got in touch with many industry practitioners from around the world. But visa rules turned out to be formidable barriers as I learnt that many design studios in US would not consider applying visas for overseas students, and that applications for work visas took a long time to process and might even require a lawyer’s assistance to apply. These ruled out the possibility of taking on a paid internship or salaried job for the next six months. These meant that financial sustainability became a growing concern. Seeking affordable housing in NYC was challenging too, and took longer than expected to settle. My basic needs were under threat. Hopes of landing dream jobs in US had to be put aside, for now. I was in “survival” mode.
In addition, organisations which I approached in NYC to partner with for IRP took longer than expected to reply, or did not have the capacity to collaborate on a student project. The “fog” of research, the ambiguity in the early stages of discovery, the intertwining topics of the refugee crisis with diversity, altruism, poverty, politics was overwhelming. I felt exhausted and hesitated about learning digital prototyping tools — Sketch, Invision, Marvel — all which was new to me.
What did I learn about myself?
I decided to search online for issues related to “drifting”. I came across other people’s experiences e.g. a parent who wrote about his 27-year-old son “drifting in life” (Barbieri, 2015) and that of Rubin Gretchen, author of the bestselling book “The Happiness Project”, who came up with an online checklist for determining whether one was at risk of being adrift (Gretchen, 2009). Rode (2013) advised to determine if one was just “going throught the motions with no purpose”, or just slowing down and taking a necessary break from the constant doing.
I realised that I had been busy conducting user interviews, reading literature — all but digital prototyping. So I had been hard at work, not lazy. My “sorry” plight did lead me to question why I was pursuing research to helping others — refugees, immigrants, locals in the community — at a time when I was struggling to sustain myself in a foreign land.
I put it down to drift — healthy exploration. The catch was in concluding this discovery phase and moving onto testing things out.
But I put off doing more prototyping — there was a mental barrier that seemed hard to overcome. I was
It was when I returned to Hyper Island Manchester when staff commented that I was procrastinating, when they observed that I would rather give a helping hand rearranging furniture in school than focus on my IRP work. Rightly or not, that led me to reflect on whether procrastination was the more appropriate description of what I was going through.
The enemy was Procrastination.
I was overtaken by fear. Lacked courage. Daunting. Perfectionism. Distractions. Disorganised.
The Way I engaged with projects
Is this the topic I really want to do?
Yes, it informs the way I understood people and society, and how this world operated. Many issues were connected in this nexus, I want to spend time unraveling it. Human-centered design required deep understanding of people, and I felt that spending this effort was necessary.
Information was overwhelming and I was not sure whether I was getting it right. I should try writing it out in a more organised manner.
Not good in digital tools yet. Embarrassed to show others my work and get negative feedback. Could have tested more with friends too instead.
Drifting from topic to topic every check-in — why?
There was a train of thought. Altruism, sharing economy, refugee, immigrant, language, music, discrimination, social integration, jobs and education.
What enabled me?
Celebrating small successes, journaling/reflections, checking in with crewmates to see them progress fearlessly, thinking less.
What are my values?
Honesty, Trustworthiness, Loyalty, and Moral Courage.
What would I do differently next time?
· Keep a journal. Keep a record of moments when procrastinating thoughts came to mind, and challenge these thoughts. The more I track these, the easier it would become to answer and dispel them (Grohol, 2005). I could also use the journal to track instances when I underbudget or overbudget time for tasks e.g. using 2 hours to create an interview discussion guide instead completing it within 1 hour as planned.
· Identify fears. Approaching people and getting negative or sarcastic comments. Learning Sketch, Invision, or Adobe suite. Fear of not being as good as others anyway.
· Getting more organised and have a better sense of time. Start using Android Business Calendar app to see what was ahead, what was happening next week. My current iPhone Calendar app did not present that overview information as well.
These will help guide my independent learning in future after graduation, and become a useful experience in my continuing professional development.
