Are social media really helping us communicating? (Yes — and No, at the same time).

This is probably going to sound pretty redundant, but it has to be said once again: communication’s tools have been evolving dramatically.

Why?

By now, you should be pretty familiar with the problematic that social medias are causing. After all, everyone has been using at least one channel, one way or another — and you, reading this article behind your screen, is part of this community.

Social medias have such a huge part in our everyday life, it would seem somehow pretty unimportant — and probably pretty annoying, to keep on discussing about it.

And perhaps it is. (But we choose to keep digging into the subject anyway).

Becoming so familiar with these different tools, in a way, has been putting a brake to further reflection that the subject could — and should entails. Yes, we know how to use it. Yes, we know how to have a huge number of likes and follower on our latest post. And most of all, yes, we can create deep and meaningful relationships using a screen. Those are facts, and whether we like it or not, society has evolved and the means of communication with it.

Period.

But do we really stop for a second, to think about the “why” besides the “how”? Probably not.

Why did it become so popular? Why is it so useful? And why, if it is so wonderful, do we still have so many problems to communicate?

A study conducted by Harvard Business, has been addressing this issue in companies: “lack of clear direction, no face-to-face or phone time and no interest in workers as individuals”[1]. Does it rings a bell? Most of us, had to face this bridge at least one time.

In a world where social media is deeply connecting us, we’ve never had so much difficulties communicating. A paradox.

Nowadays, when employees wish to interact with their peers, their first thought is to open their internal chat or send an e-mail. Concise and succinct, it only takes a minute to send, and enable to avoid small talk — which is really nice and all, but really Karen, I don’t need to know what you did with the postman.

So, all in all, it is a wonderful combination, winning on all sides. Except perhaps on two distinct fronts: the overload, and the need for social interaction.

Yes, sending an e-mail is nice, easy and fast. But to a point where we actually use it too much.

“I receive hundreds of emails a day. I can spend my whole day responding to incoming messages. I can’t find anything in my inbox », Harvard Business Review talks about this new problem. This threat of overload can become a real problem to efficiency, while the tool in itself remains essential in the company. “I’ve had email since 1983. I couldn’t live the life I live without it,” says David Allen, consultant and author of Getting Things Done.

Does it mean we should completely ban internal e-mail, like the CEO of Atos chose to do in 2013 ? Probably not, as this action is just another extreme side of the problem. Taking control of the flow, being kept informed of the new problems links to media and being conscious of its limit is the first step toward a harmonious communication.

Another step toward a sustainable communication lays in social interaction. The lack of social interaction, has been a part of why, e-mail overload has been happening.

Yes, small talk, mostly is useless — and no Karen, I still don’t want to hear about the beautiful smile of the postman. Well, it is the whole point of small talk: bonding over unimportant matters. This underestimated skill is worth developing, argues Carol Fleming, author of The Serious Business of Small Talk. Over a coffee, during a handshake, or even when handing a document in another division in the company, those are all different opportunities to a little chat with your colleagues. And maybe gives you the opportunity to widen the conversation to deeper topics or perhaps help you with one of your request. Through small talk, we establish trust between interlocutors, as we get to observe the body language and the facial expression while making eye contact… All of the basic interactions that are missing when we are only using social media.

An e-mail can only give a certain amount of information, and often erase all the aspects –be it visual or tactile, that are needed to create a trusting and meaningful relationship.

Social media is a tool, not a purpose in itself.

And we tend to forget it, too caught up in the habits and easiness at which we can share information.

In a way, the secret for a sustainable and meaningful communication is to stop forgetting ourselves by communicating too much behind a screen.

Period.

[1] ADWEEK, Communications Tactics You Should Be Using Internally to Help Your Own Team, Mary.C.Long, 2017