The Ulitmate List of 116 Sexual Experiments You Have to Try (Part 1 of 12)

Henri Marcus
Intimacy Chronicles
7 min readJan 4, 2021

--

2021 is about new experiments for us.

We are putting together a list of experiments we are trying this year. But before we get to the list, here’s a little backstory.

Our relationship is unique in a number of ways.

  1. We’ve been together for 30+ years.
  2. We’ve been one-and-only for each other in our lives (meaning we’ve both had just one sexual partner, ever, and that’s each other)
  3. We’re heterosexual, deeply in love, and are still passionate about getting it on.
  4. In our late 40’s we still sneak around our working kids to find a closed door behind which, we like to get naked and ride each other forever.

So, how did this list of experiments come about?

The idea was to explore the depth of our intimacy by pushing the envelope and crossing the boundaries of our sexual escapades of the past 30 years.

When our relationship started, it was the usual maniacal phase of 5 times a day sex, that slowly tapered off, and before we knew it, it was down to 5 times a month.

Though I’d like to believe we never went down to 5 times a year, but we were in the low double digits ballpark, give or take.

Ultimately, in 2020, I decided to take matters into my own hands (not literally, as I already had those “matters” in my hands :-) If you catch my drift ;-) )

Background

One of the reasons behind the starvation in our sex life was the sudden onset of an expectation of “mature” behavior with kids growing up into adults, and therefore, sex as a playful activity taking a back seat.

However, this past year’s lockdown gave us an opportunity to stay behind closed doors for a long period of time and being forced into stealing those moments of privacy, that we so casually took for granted otherwise.

We began talking more about the intimacy in our physical relationship, and as I do for every topic of discussion, I got out and read about it.

I discovered these threads on Medium, and my sex life has never been the same again.

Last year has been about a revelation of sorts, with cunnilingus becoming an important part of our sex rituals.

We also tried some vibrators, and board games, the reviews of which are coming up on this publication shortly.

Having intimate conversations, including some really dirty talk, led us to a quest to explore uncharted territory when it comes to sex, and we’re now at a point where we are discussing our yes/no/maybe list candidly.

I began doing my research on Medium and then on the rest of the internet, and have compiled a list of these 116 sex experiments, that I believe you MUST try at least once.

I’m also going to add some explanations for topics that I didn’t know anything about and then there are some simple ones.

It was nearly impossible for me to fit in all 116 in one post, so I have decided to break it down into 12 posts, and I will talk about 10 experiments in each post.

For each of these items, I am also including our own verdict, as it indicates whether we’re going to add this to our own sexual repertoire this year or not.

If you would like me to publish a more detailed explanation on any of these, including my own experience with them, drop me a comment below.

So, without much further ado, here we go on our list.

1. 69

It was one of my first daring experiments when I began trying Kamasutra positions. Not as tough as some of the other positions, it gives a fairly good experience and has a few variations some of which may require acrobatic skills.

Elsewhere on medium, one of Medium’s gifted writers Ms. Part Time Wino does suggest that 69 is probably overrated, so there’s that.

Some variations may include the use of anal activity and Ms. Part Time Wino does negate the starfish experience as unwelcome.

For some adventurous souls, the use of a finger comes in handy, but for us, the “missionary” 69 works best.

Our verdict: Definitely a YES

2. Anal Sex

Without going much into the explanation, let’s just say it’s a complete NO for us. Now before you take out the pitchforks, hear me out.

I’m 48 years old, and I have nothing against anal sex (my first ever experience with another human being was anal, hell I even thought man to woman sex was about anal when I was 10) and I fondly remember that sex as one of the most pleasurable experiences in my early-puberty days.

However, none of us fancy it as such and is an entirely personal choice.

Our verdict: Definite NO

3. Anal Stimulation

When I read about it, I am intrigued by the idea, but I am going to have to go with the missus on this one.

Typically this would involve anal beads, to use as a stimulant while engaging in normal intercourse, that can be oral or PIV

Our verdict: Maybe (I have to do some more research)

4. Asphyxiation

We have never tried it so I can’t say for sure if this will give us the fun side of sex. I believe there is a lot to be explored (even on the kink & BDSM side) before getting on the more serious stuff.

Especially when there’s a possibility of this getting real dangerous really fast. In fact, Bradlee Bryant wrote this amazing piece about asphyxiation that you HAVE to read.

Therefore, as of this year, it’s on our NO list, possibly a maybe for next year

5. Barebacking

Now, barebacking originally was used to refer to purely anal sex between two gay partners.

Off late, however, I’ve seen this term being used for all forms of sex, including vaginal penetration, but without the condom, so it’s definitely a YES.

We love the skin on skin experience, and our favorite method of birth control is IUD, so the only form of penetration we know is barebacking.

Yes, Yes, Yes!

6. Biting & Nibbling

Oh I can’t even begin to describe how quickly the missus yelled YES in my ear, when I said the word “nibbling”

One of our favorite go-to (and Sureshot successful) ways for her to find the big O is when I gently nibble around her areola on both sides.

It’s our version of a breast based orgasm and we both love the feeling, so it’s a big YES, many times over this year.

7. Blended Orgasms

We’re not big on finger play or anal, for that matter, so this one is a little bit tricky.

However, #6 above refers to pure breast play, while clitoral and vaginal orgasms are always our favorite.

We may have to work out a few kinks but blended orgasms are definitely on our to-do list for this year.

The first time we attempted it was something I learned from Bradlee Bryant in one of her posts (I will post the link here — I tried searching for that piece, but couldn’t, I’ll reach out to her)

8. Blindfolds

The verdict is divided on this for us. While we’ve used them in the past and have fond memories, missus sometimes isn’t always on board, especially when we include handcuffs in the mix, and therefore, it’s on our YES list, but minus the hand-cuffs.

For me, a blindfold with handcuffs that are softly used to restrain her hands give the ultimate high, so I’m definitely intending to bring them in the mix, in a way that her consent and pleasure are the primary drivers.

9. Blowing air in the ear

Not many people enjoy this, but there are some that do. If it works, it could work for either one of the partners. We have yet to try it, but I’m definitely up for it.

The verdict is MAYBE

10. Body Paint

There’s gotta be a time, place and occassion for it. There are fantasies that some of us nurture, one of them being able to paint murals or tattoos (of the temporary kind) that helps live out one’s fantasies without long lasting impression on the skin.

I have dabbled in painting and we wouldn’t mind using our bodies as a way to express our innermost desires in person, via the medium of the paint.

It’s definitely a YES on our list.

11. Bondage

Oh well, what do I say about this. It’s definitely been on my list of must-haves and we’ve tried it a few times earlier in our marriage. After kids, life takes on a more mature role and as you may have read in one of my other posts, our sex life was pretty much on a rut for a while in between.

So, bondage was off limits, but now that we’re rediscovering our passion for each other, it’s back on the table. We’re currently doing soft silk scarves and the resulting sensations and pleasure enhancements are out of this world.

Definitely YES

So, that, my friends is my list of Items 1–11 of my Yes/No/Maybe

Watch this space for items 12–22 next. Some of them include Bondage Toys, Caressing, Clitoral Stimulation, Cock Rings and Compliments

All four in a combination make up for a full day (and night) of uninterrupted sex, 6–7 times at least.

What are your go-to experiments this year?

Let me know in the comments and I’d love to add them to my list (if they’re not already on my 116 items)

--

--

Henri Marcus
Intimacy Chronicles

Husband, Explorer, Ambitious Writer. I am recreating intimacy in my relationships, step by step and am telling the whole story as it unfolds