My Personal Journal: 08 –12 –20 (Tuesday) — Very satisfied with this day’s outcome 😊 💕
Well, so this day has been like a blast and also something worth resisting for and worth fighting. I dare to say that those precise feelings, even though rough sounding, at the end of the day pay-off.
I mean, I suppose I had already learned or knew that before, but it was also like I had forgotten about it.
Like when you see an average relative again after not having seeing them in years or an interval so broad that you forgot many particular details but seem to remember them just after seeing them once.
That’s how I’ve felt with “working” and “enduring” lately. At the beginning of my depression treatment, though, this wasn’t the way these things came to my mind.
Yeah, I mean, even fathoming the thought of looking or considering this type and similar situations as something worth doing or worth fighting, I used to see them with sadness for being me who has had to deal with them.
Anyway, I will try to start by doing a recap of where we left yesterday and to try and write about it here to look for places we improved and also for ones that need to be improved on.
For instance, one thing that has made me feel awesome and my happiest is that:
Today I felt like I was in control of myself perfectly all day long, even more so than how I’ve felt on previous “good days”
Why? Well, for the first time in a long time (like the Billy Joel’s song says):
- Today I Started paying for a formal Podcast Hosting service FOR THE FIRST TIME IN MY LIFE (YAY! You prolly think my excitement is irrational but I’m kind of the type of person that gets really bumped up when paying stuff).
- I finally set myself and accomplished the recording of the first chapter of my most recent Short Novel Project, which I will upload as an audio book as the chapters are being both written and recorded (you can check my Wattpad for more info)
- I did something I wasn’t requested to do that ultimately ended up helping someone close to me, so despite the effort it costed me was heavy and strong, the satisfaction and calmness of things flowing lighter by my intervention makes me feel amazingly good.
- So, well, without even needing to point it out, but still going to point it out cause I can so:
Today I made a sacrifice for a close one, and, thanks to my intervention in the problem, the events and the environment evolved in a more soft manner.
Let’s say, through doing this thing that for me was a sacrifice, I offered myself and chose
To Give up a determined quantity of the money I had in order for things between me and that person, and between that person and the environment and context that surrounded said person, could go the smoothest.
Anyway, hopefully I’ll end up the day feeling as awesome as I feel in this moment, and lastly, to end this journal entry (not because I’m tired of doing it already, it’s more a question of me feeling tired actually) I have a very special photo prepared.
That’s a picture of the night sky I took today outside on my porch (which was originally destined for another post).
So, without captions, I know maybe I don’t have the clearest sky because of the cable’s making visual pollution which electricity companies from this country are making and ignoring, but what I did have was the gift and marvelous emotion of being able to look at them (since there are some who can’t do so anymore),
And by looking over there I eventually felt better, happy for and grateful that my sight hadn’t deteriorated enough for me to not be able to not see the stars at the furthest, darkest part of the picture, which’s light made me feel warm despite the night being so cold and it being far away.
Have you ever feel that way? Like you need a warm hug or something that provides you heat in the middle of the night or in the coldest moment, and you find it from a place that you wouldn’t even have considered to look for?
Feel free to answer in the comments 🍃
That’s just how I felt by looking at them and that’s also why I chose the picture.
Hope you’ve had an amazing day, too.
— aléph L.
I Would REALLY BE THANKFUL AND APPRECIATE YOUR FOLLOWING ON MY SOCIAL MEDIA SITES:
Thanks for reading up until this point folks hope you have a good one!
