Conversation with My Wife (88)


Frost on a car, photo by author, because it turns out looking for public domain stock photos with the key word “regrets” does not result in useful product. See also Roy Schlegel and his adventures in stock photos.

ME: I need your help, honey. I have a prompt for a themed piece from Terijo on regrets.

DEB: Like the birds? 🎶 “Egrets… I’ve had a few… But then again… Too few to mention…”* 🎶

ME: I don’t know I have any regrets! How can I regret a life that ends with you? And if anything changed along the way, I wouldn’t be with you, so anything I regret doing or happening is worth it, because I ended up with you.

DEB: Okay, but what about getting together sooner? Not like when we were kids or anything, but maybe a few years younger? One thing that I regret is that we’ll never make it to our 50th. I wish I’d met you sooner.

ME: But not too soon! We learned too much from our respective divorces.

We’ve talked about this before. For Deb, it was learning to stand up for herself, when she walked away from an abusive relationship in her previous marriage; learning that marriages are NOT easy like her parents’ was (or at least what her parents let their kids see); and marriages really do take work. Me, it was learning to never take a marriage for granted; and always, always try to be a better husband.

DEB: Okay, I got divorced from John in 1990; when did you move to Pennsylvania from California?

ME: I got divorced in 1990, also, then I got to PA** in 1993. So seven extra years, we just celebrated our 18th, we’d be celebrating our silver 25th! But we’ll never make our golden 50th. We can regret that!

DEB: We’ll just have to settle for the rest of our lives. (dramatic sigh)*** I guess I can live with that.

*I thought about putting in a link to the song, but then you’d be hearing Frank Sinatra, rather than how Deb did it her way.

**I should mention that I am not abbreviating the name of our state in the transcript; Pennsylvanians actually refer to their home as “p-a” in conversation. So I guess I should spell it out as “pee-ay” to be correct. But I’m not going to.

***Some folks might say over-dramatic. She reads all these stories now that she’s on Medium, so one of those folks is not me. (Hi honey! Love you! Mean it!)



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Jack Herlocker

Jack Herlocker


Husband & retiree. Developer, tech writer, & IT geek. I fill what’s empty, empty what’s full, and scratch where it itches. Occasionally do weird & goofy things.