Anti-Plant Vitriol is Shocking!

Especially when they make such yummy food

Hypochaeris radicata: Harmless Cat’s Ear, or GENOCIDAL WATER THIEF?

I recently signed up for a “Gardeners” group on Facebook and almost immeditately unsubscribed. Almost every post was about how terrible “weeds” are, how much people hate dandelions and clovers, and how good it is to spray them. Dandelions, most people agreed, are “ugly,” and weeds “waste water” and should be destroyed.

One commenter even said that whomever taught kids to make wishes by blowing on dandelions should be “taken out and shot.”

I was so taken aback, I left the group before I even thought to take screenshots!

There are over 3000 people in this group. Nobody came to the defense of dandelions.

When you start getting into the world of “invasives,” it’s another whole level of hatred. Here’s someone who DESPISES knapweed (Centaurea spp.):

And yet, knapweed is one of our most BEAUTIFUL flowers:

In Praise of Knapweed

Here’s another:

Yes, it’s Japanese Knotweed. It’s a terribly opportunistic plant, considered “invasive,” but should the correct answer to any question regarding plants be “KILL IT WITH FIRE. NOW”? It’s edible, and apparently pretty tasty. I’ll let Green Deane take it from here:

Japanese Knotweed: Dreadable Edible

Look, I wouldn’t ever argue that natives aren’t preferable to non-natives, and that some plants, be they weeds or opportunistic volunteers like knotweed, may not be the most appropriate for your setting, especially if you’re producing food and you’re worried about resources. However, did anyone ever stop to consider that there may be a more reasonable approach to opportunistic plants than jumping in with “KILL IT WITH FIRE”?

The fact is, a large part of the cultural tendency to DESTROY weeds and other opportunistics like knotweed is a narrative developed and sold by the herbicide industry.

Dow Chemicals, for instance, strongly suggests “controlling invasives.”

Vegetation Management - Industries and Use Sites - Invasive Species

Monsanto and their development of glyphosate are another result of this narrative. I won’t get too into the “deets” here, but Toby Hemenway has a pretty good overview in this book review:

Another Kind of Genocide

See also:

Saving Native Wildlife with "Invasive" Plants

In the interest of “Gnostic Gardening,” it’s worth noting that the “weeds/invasive plants” narrative seems somewhat like a false narrative that the providential grower can break free of. Faced with an opportunistic plant that’s growing in an area within your metaentity, how about considering the following list of questions?

1. Can I use it?
2. Is it pretty?
3. Is it really damaging anything?
4. Is it really competing with my other plants for resources?
5. If yes, can I manage it somehow that has the least amount of impact on my environment, takes the least amount of time and effort, and doesn’t require buying into the herbicide industry’s propaganda?

Managing opportunistic species on an industrial/societal level is a whole subject that deserves entire books. This one looks promising (embed doesn’t seem to be working, so CLICK THE LINK):

http://www.chelseagreen.com/beyond-the-war-on-invasive-species

However, as individuals, there are fun ways we can deal with “weeds” that may help us see them in an entirely different light. For instance, we can make a delicious jelly!

Here’s a weed in my yard that’s thriving in spite of the grass-killing drought conditions:

That’s Daucus carota, aka Queen Anne’s Lace or Wild Carrot (this can be confused with poison hemlock, so be sure you have a good ID!). Queen Anne’s Lace has hairy stems. It usually, but not always, has one to three red or purple blossoms in the center of its inflorescence. Its stems are solid, NOT hollow. It smells like carrots. Seriously, be 100% sure of your ID. I can’t remember where I heard it, but one way I remember it is that “Queen Anne has hairy legs. She pricked her finger and a drop of blood fell into her lace.”

That mass of D. carota might look “messy,” but check out what its flowers turn into:

WOW!

I KNOW, IT’S BEAUTIFUL, RIGHT!?

It’s all over the place in our ‘hood, as are a number of other “weedy” wild flowers, like the cat’s ear pictured above (also in my lawn), purple clover, English daisy, and wild lavender bushes. What can we do with wild “weed” flowers? I’m glad you asked!

First, collect a whole bunch of them:

Now break them up into little pieces and get rid of as much green as you can (some stems are OK, but the more green, the more you risk bitter flavors). Measure them, packed, in cups. Add to a pot or non-reactive bowl and cover with boiling water in a 2-to-1 ratio of water to flowers.

Pretty!

Now, leave them overnight.

The next day, drain the liquid into another pot and squeeze as much of the rest of the liquid out of the solids as possible. Discard the solids. Bring to a simmer, and add sugar (approximately 1 cup per 3 cups of liquid), lemon juice (2 tablespoons), and whisked-in pectin (follow the instructions on the packet — keep in mind that some commercial pectins include citric acid, in which case you can skip the lemon juice).

When it’s all dissolved, pour into jars and refrigerate. Voila! Easy, miraculous wildflower jelly! No pretty pictures — just imagine a translucent, shimmering orange confection with a blossomy, verdant scent.

“Weeds” my ass. Tell that to the amazing, delicate, floral treat I get to use on cookies and toast and such.

Don’t spray your plants, is what I’m saying, even if they’re opportunistic. Instead, learn about them, and make them into things!