4 Common Misconceptions about Addictive Relationships
Unpacking core attachment wounds in trauma bonds & love addiction.
Anyone caught in a loop of addictive or trauma-bonded relationships instinctively recognizes the pattern in which they are caught. They “know” on a subconscious level that their choices in a partner resonate with their core wounds and that their ability to be present and emotionally vulnerable with their partner is limited because of these core wounds.
Ironically (or not), it is this exact pattern of choosing a partner who mirrors their attachment insecurities that initially attracts them to that person. They also understand that addictive or trauma-bonded relationships include high levels of manipulation and codependency that reinforce being bound by trauma to their partner.
Yet, even with knowing these challenges, many find it difficult to walk away. They make excuses to stay and rationalize their own behavior and that of their partner. These rationalizations are what keep them “stuck”, holding out hope that the relationship will improve, that they didn’t “marry their mother” or aren’t “dating their dad”, and that their relationship issues are “not so bad”.
In its simplest form, addictive or trauma-bonded relationships are based on the old adage, “I hate you; don’t…
