6 Subtle Signs You Are Experiencing Unhealed Trauma

Image by Anemone123 from Pixabay

What is trauma?

When most people think about trauma, they assume that an individual would’ve experienced an extreme event like war, natural disaster or abuse. However, according to Medical News Today, ‘trauma is a response to an event that a person finds highly stressful’. So from that definition, even smaller, everyday events can trigger trauma, such as divorce, the death of a loved one, illness, moving to a new location, and childbirth.

The signs of trauma

1. You have trouble asking for help

A person with trauma often doesn’t want to say when they think something is wrong, for fear that others will judge them. They often feel embarrassed or ashamed of their situation.

2. You have low self-esteem

I have suffered from low self-esteem at various points throughout my whole life, so I thought it was a normal feeling. I didn’t realize that it had gotten worse when I became a mother.

3. You have a need to please others

Experiencing trauma may cause someone to have a constant need to diffuse conflict and earn approval. You try to please everyone to avoid any situation that can cause you to experience stress and anxiety.

4. You need to be in control of everything

The need to be in control may come from a traumatic experience where you were left vulnerable and helpless. You may have had an experience where you lost autonomy and were left at the mercy of someone else, so now you need to be in control to avoid having that experience again.

5. You hurt others and yourself

Sometimes when we have unhealed trauma, we can be overly sensitive, causing us to lash out at ourselves or at people around us. Self-harm, negative self-talk, yelling at others, and putting other people down are all signals that you could have trauma.

6. You are experiencing unexplained psychological symptoms

Some of the most common signs of trauma are obsessive and compulsive behaviors, irritability, mood swings, and extreme sadness. These manifest in people in different ways, which often appear to be inexplicable. For example, experiencing extreme emotional stress can cause people to develop tics. Or it can make you feel numb to everyday experiences and emotions.

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