EVERYTHING IS ‘MATERIAL’

Michelle Monet
Sep 5, 2018 · 4 min read

The joys of being a writer, in the midst of it all.

A writer — and, I believe, generally all persons — must think that whatever happens to him or her is a resource. All that happens to us, including our humiliations, our misfortunes, our embarrassments, all is given to us as raw material, as clay, so that we may shape our art.

JORGE LUIS BORGES


As I look around at the world issues (UGH!) , my own family dysfunction, my anxiety condition, and so many other negative shit I realize that I am grateful I am a writer.

I am glad I can write about it all. It helps me.

I also love solitude.

Thinking about my dad who is now in rehab and stuck in a tiny room without being able to run, he has to finally face his solitude. He’s never been good at solitude. Actually he’s hated it. He’s always been the Playboy guy ‘Wheres the party? dude.

Now the party might be over for him. So much for him to process.

Me, the writer watches and observes from a distance. I’m so glad I get to write about it all though.


I look at my friends who are mostly in their late 50s like me. So many don’t know where they fit or belong in this new world anymore.

My friend Rachel is 59 and single. She has so many health issues to deal with(broke her back, recent cancer rehab, anxiety issues etc), plus her ex husband will not give her a single dime in support. So much has been added to her plate recently, that she says it all feels overwhelming.

The other day she said “I don’t have hope. I see myself a few years from now getting older and even more and more sickly — -and I can’t fathom how I will deal with it all, honestly…If it weren't for my cat, Bindi, I might just end it”.

This was so sad to hear, but I am witnessing it as a writer, and I can write about it.

It is sad to me that she has been lost in the ‘shuffle’ because she is a super kind hearted vibrant talented woman, actress, singer, animal lover — but she admitted ‘I feel weary now’.

She hasn’t been able to find a job that pays enough to sustain her life. I recommended she try to get some benefits from the government, to explain her situation honestly to an attorney. Hey, if anyone deserves some help she does!

She said she had too much pride to ask for help. I think she must humble herself (we all must) and admit that we need help sometimes.

She does need the help. I hope she can get it.


Another artist friend of mine in her late 50s Patti is a super creative visual artist but after her mom died she went into a depression. She hasn’t been able to find her way back, or find her for many years since. She is also just ‘hanging on’ by a thread, as she says. She finally decided to seek help with a therapist, but admitted to me the other day “I feel hopeless a lot”.

Another friend Jackie who is 56, my age, has also dealt with cancer and many other health issues too lately. She lives with her teenaged disabled son. She is on Goverment Assistance for her ‘anxiety’ issues.

She says she feels like her life is one big whack-a-mole game, and says, ‘I’m getting weary. How long can I keep playing this game? I don’t feel much hope. It even feels hopeless!”

So, three of my good friends used the word ‘Hopeless’ to me in the past few days.

UGH.


Sometimes the sadness around me does seem overwhelming (thankfully I live with a rather cheerful optimistic half full cup guy, who I’m grateful for).

Sometimes I can’t think of one damn thing to do about it all, except write. That’s it. Write, and keep writing.

EVERYTHING is a story. Every single thing in life can be ‘used’ when you are a writer. This is the beauty of writing.

I think about myself as an old-er lady. Unlike many of these people I will always have my pen and I will ALWAYS write.

My dad might be in total terror living in his own mind now. He doesn’t write or do anything creative. He is alone laying in a bed most of the day, watching sports, knowing his time on this earth is short, looking at himself at age 86 in the mirror.

I’m just glad I am a writer and I always will be. No matter what size room I am put in.


THANKS FOR READING!

www.michellemonet.com

Check out all my books on my Amazon Author Page

https://www.amazon.com/Michelle-Monet/e/B01J5X26QS/ref=dp_byline_cont_book_1

Invisible Illness

We don't talk enough about mental health.

Michelle Monet

Written by

Musician. Author. Poet. Cat Mama. Seeker. Curious Creator. Currently writing showbiz memoir and Broadway style Musical. contact: michelle@michellemonet.com

Invisible Illness

We don't talk enough about mental health.

Welcome to a place where words matter. On Medium, smart voices and original ideas take center stage - with no ads in sight. Watch
Follow all the topics you care about, and we’ll deliver the best stories for you to your homepage and inbox. Explore
Get unlimited access to the best stories on Medium — and support writers while you’re at it. Just $5/month. Upgrade