Eyes Closed

I was serenely gliding alongside the Allegheny River on a stretch of smooth, thick tar that lay tamed. Allegheny Boulevard was no longer riddled with snow-sponsored potholes or dotted with gravely pockmarks as the sickliness of winter had finally begun to subside. The streets were redeemed and I coasted gracefully to all of my destinations on their even black surfaces, even to places I had never purposefully planned to travel. I was swept across the city by the shine of new sleek roads that I could practically taste. If I slid my tongue along these caramel coated, licorice intersections I imagined it would taste like solidified maple syrup. Pure, perfect, sweet streets. And the river herself was all dressed up, catching pockets of sunshine in her dainty ripples, each ebb and flow sneaking a wink at me as I drove by, her waves cresting perfectly in synch to the music leaking out of my radio. How uncanny and utterly marvelous that the waves could keep a rhythmic pace matching the loud and soft sounds volleying between my ears, music that made me drum my fingers on the dash. Candy streets, a flirtatious river, and the loudest, lightest, loveliest tinkling melody all performing an enchanting, choreographed spectacle just for me.

As I drifted I whispered an emphatic thank you to my sturdy and trustworthy chariot, my 1998 Lexus, which was gifted to me by my great aunt because she had grown too old to drive to temple. In the family my great aunt is known as a thoughtful, generous woman so it was no surprise that she left me countless Klezmer cassette tapes in the center console that I should “use in good health” (a kind command she probably exclaimed in Yiddish). I leaned my head back against the beige leather headrest and caught glimpses of wispy clouds darting overhead through the open sunroof. I was completely free. I could fly wherever I wanted. My hand fluttered in the tickling wind as I rested it on the open car window, sighing deeply and breathing in air glittered with sugar crystals. Life was just that sweet and I knew it was designed explicitly with me in mind. For this is the divinely coordinated beauty of my life.

I hummed contentedly. My right foot, encased in a well-loved sneaker, but arched with poise as if it were in a ballerina’s silk slipper, nudged more pressure onto the gas pedal and my chariot picked up speed, just like I asked. I widened my eyes as the sublime symphony of existence blossomed around me. The billowing cool wind, the crystal air filling my lungs, music that played for the sole audience of my ears, river water twinkling for my eyes only, and glossy confident streets that left me with endless options. I was overwhelmed by these blessings. All I could do was praise the tears pooling puddles in my lashes and worship every heavy drop that decorated my cheeks. I had never felt so enraptured before. Life had never been so exquisitely blissful. My heart was bursting with such intense adoration for this cherished existence that my body soon surrendered to my miracle and with God’s name on my glistening, smiling, pink parted lips I closed my eyes tightly and drove even faster.