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How I Overcame the Dissonant Duet of Anxiety and Panic Attacks
Surviving the battlefields of neuroses, exploring the hows and whys, and learning to coexist with the enemy
First came anxiety, a lingering dread, stabbingly present yet often without a clear cause.
I was dogged by an inferiority complex and the spotlight effect, with pencil-chewing nervousness and constant overthinking.
As a boy, I couldn’t articulate these feelings. Once anxiety hardwired itself into my responses, it became normal, and I stopped questioning it.
Besides, it’s easier to deny that which has no name.
No one fancies themselves a neurotic. It’s about as sexy as stale bread.
I spent my teens with a constant unease pressing against my ribs.
I gasped for peer approval and tried to get girls to notice me, but my scrawny frame and matching insecurity weren’t exactly selling points — all while dodging head-stompings on my way to and from school.
Then came the hash venture, an odd choice for someone anxious, leaving me in simmering paranoia, always on edge about cop raids or warring drug gangs eager to tax overambitious “startups” like mine.