How to Make it Through the Constant Grief of Abuse
Navigating the ever-present grief of ambiguous loss in the case of childhood abuse
The grief of childhood abuse is never-ending. Even if we find ourselves outside of the abusive webs we grew up in, grief is with us every step of the way. Usually, it’s this separation that lets grief come in waves. We’ve survived so much.
And there’s a lot to mourn. As we grow older and enter into sources of healing, we may realize that those we thought were safe adults were perpetrators. That realization alone brings a whole new layer of grief as we navigate through our childhoods and come to terms with how much of our experience was a lie.
It feels like constant grief on the healing journey. Grief for little me who went through too much; grief for what I missed out on; grief for who I needed my parents to be and wanted them to be; grief for the first half of my life.
I desperately wanted loving and accepting parents; I wanted them to be a source of safety for me. I wanted that loving and healthy childhood. There’s a lot of loss to handle, a lot of trauma to process. And there are people we must separate from in order to heal.
I’ve read a lot of resources on navigating healing from abuse and estrangement, but few if any…
