“I Can’t Take it Anymore”
When you know you need to get help
Content Warning: mentions of suicide and self-harm
I write a lot of articles on mental health, and they’re all based on my own experiences. After seven-odd years of living with clinical depression and generalized anxiety disorder, I consider myself a bit of an expert on how it all works.
A lot of people have commented about how my articles have helped them. The most consistent piece of feedback I receive for my two books is how the protagonists are so relatable. It feels like forever that I’ve been battling this invisible demon, and that experience (coupled with a fascination with human psychology in general) is the very reason I’m able to write about the subject and make my characters relatable.
But even I forgot one thing.
Clinical depression never goes away completely.
It’s a beguiling disease. Always present, always active, always lurking just beneath the surface. You might feel okay, like you’ve conquered it, like you don’t need your medicines anymore. But all it takes is one trigger — one trigger — and you’re back at the bottom of the pit.
Last night, something happened. Something all-too-familiar, yet completely unexpected. I had a breakdown. A proper, long, intense breakdown. Out of…
