My Mysterious Illness Finally Had an Answer
I finally believed my emotional and mental stress was making me physically sick
‘She’s absolutely out of her mind! A psychiatrist? What is she even thinking!’
My dad stormed out of the doctor’s room as my body crouched over in despair. ‘What is wrong with me? What’s wrong with my body?’ These have been the burning questions we’ve been trying to answer for the past year and we seemed to have hit a wall. The doctor referred me to a psychiatrist as a last resort.
After running through every possible test in the hospital, conducting several body scans, and waking up from anesthesia, numb and yet remembering the intrusive tubes stuck into my throat and body, it was disheartening to find each test to come back negative. No results. Nothing. The illness remains unknown. Like a ghost eating up my body day by day. In less than a year or so, I lost 10kg (22Ib) as an 18-year-old young woman who’s supposed to be at her prime age physically.
I was frail and pale and could barely eat on most days. For most people around me, I looked like a severe case of anorexia, but I felt so misunderstood for I knew that wasn’t the case. I didn’t want to leave the house or meet anyone for I would be asked about how thin I looked, and shame engulfed me everywhere I went…
