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Relationship Anxiety and the “Ick”
Where does one stop and the other begin?
I’ve ruminated so much on my relationship at this point that even though it’s a very healthy relationship and my SO is very securely attached, my brain just can’t seem to cope with that. There were moments in the beginning of the relationship where some small gestures and habits turned me off.
For most people, they would consider this the “ick” and debate breaking up with the person. However, for someone with relationship anxiety and/or ROCD, I have no idea what constitutes the “ick” or if it’s just my hyper-fixating on traits to distance myself from my SO.
The “ick” is a turn-off that can be a pet peeve or, at worst, a red flag. If someone is racist, misogynistic, or rude to you, that’s an “ick” that is 100% justified in causing a relationship to crumble. However, there are many “icks” I’ve seen online that people have dumped others over that I thought were seemingly inane.
People dropped potential partners for calling them a specific pet name instead of just asking them not to do that, or they found out their partner had an interest that wasn’t inherently bad but something they thought was embarrassing. I really thought I was above them to an extent in that I wanted to see someone and appreciate them for their inner beauty, interests and…
