Member-only story
RSD — Ruining Good Days Since Childhood
A real-life glimpse into rejection sensitive dysphoria
Well, it happened again.
After an end-of-year school event, my kid and I stopped to chat with one of their friends and their friend’s mom. As the kids played, another neighbor mom walked up and joined the conversation. The moms started discussing upcoming vacation plans with one another, and then came:
“You need to come over before we leave!”
“Yeah, it’s been way too long!”
Now, I’m not actually friends with either of these moms. Our kids attend the same school, and we live in the same large neighborhood. They seem perfectly nice. Maybe we could be friends one day, but are we now? No.
Even though my brain understood that, a familiar pit opened in my stomach. I felt myself spiraling into sadness. I’d like an invite. Why don’t they like me? Why don’t they want to get to know me? Why is it so hard for me to make friends?
Sadness and shame washed over me in waves, but I just stood there smiling and trying not to look awkward. The worst part? I knew it was irrational. I knew they weren’t intentionally excluding me — we barely knew each other! But I’ve learned over the past few years that knowing something intellectually doesn’t magically…
