Stop and Ask Yourself

You might meet a lot of people that unhappily describe themselves as being on “autopilot”. They feel as though their lives are run by the same routine, without much vigor or variation. There’s dissatisfaction, boredom, and obligation. Yet somehow, time seems to fly even though they’re not having fun.

Perhaps this is you. Life is moving right on along, and though you’ve answered the bell and you’re doing all the things you “should” be doing — so working, paying your bills on time, only cheating on your taxes a little bit — there’s still the dissatisfaction. There’s still a sense of incompletion or time not well spent.

Time is important, though. We all know how important time is. Though we tend to not treat it as such, we’re all very much aware that time is our most valuable currency as it’s never to be replenished. That said, our measurements of life and life’s worth can’t be separated from time. We know we’re on a clock of some sort, and if that clock didn’t exist and we had as much time as we wanted to do whatever we want with our lives, surely a lot of our pressures and negative commentary about how we’re spending our time would cease to exist.

With that in mind, it’s crucial to understand that the source of many judgments about what we’re doing with our lives are relative to time. Maybe not if you’re out killing people for a living (That’s probably a moral dilemma), but for most of us who live a more ordinary type of lifestyle. Getting to the core of a dissatisfying life usually requires us to ask ourselves what we’re doing with our time. What are we doing with this fleeting opportunity? What are we doing with each present moment, which are the only snippets of life we’ll ever truly live in as they vanish to the past in an instant and the future is anyone’s guess?

Time is running out.

It’s an undeniable truth, and although you already know it, hearing it again might give you a twitch of awareness or aliveness. This is a twtich that reminds you that what you’re currently seeing, hearing, smelling, tasting and touching in front of you is all that you really have.

So what now? For at least a moment, we’re hyper present and aware of our limited time on this earth which is dwindling by the millisecond, and here you are reading my poorly edited article. Well, what can I tell ya? How can we get through this thing together?

All I can offer you at this moment and any moment is the opportunity to ask yourself one question. It’s a question that is sure to optimize your time on this earth.

That question is, “Am I doing what I want to be doing?”

GROUNDBREAKING, I know. It might also be rephrased as, “Am I doing something that makes me happy?”, “Am I enjoying myself right now?”, or even, “Am I doing the best possible thing at this moment?”. And if the answer is yes, and you’ve considered the likely consequences, then that’s fucking great, you’ve got it figured out! Keep on keepin’ on!

There is, an extra level, however. Because a lot of the time we’re not doing what we’d most want to be doing, and unless there’s some colony of people out there who spend all day running naked in a field while eating ice cream, I’m betting that we all have a least small bouts of time where we’d rather be doing something else. And why is that? That’s because that thing I said before about the aliveness that comes with acknowledging that this moment in front of you is all you’ll ever have goes away. For 99.9% of us, it doesn’t last. It would be madness if all our brains could keep up with the present moment like that. We’re constantly working around stimuli to sort out the best scenario given what we want for the future and how that can be attained based on the experiences we’ve had in the past.

With our current mode of operating in mind, there is a follow up question you can ask yourself if your answer to the first question of, “Am I doing what I want to be doing?” was, “No”.

Question 1A is, “Is what I’m doing at least an investment in the future?”. So is this current action at least purposeful in building something I want down the road? From here, it can get trickier. Thoughts about balancing present happiness with future planning may come into play. Thoughts about efficiency in pursuing future goals given your limited amount of time might come into play. Thoughts about the true value of that future goal may come into play. Questions like that are viable and can and should be addressed separately, perhaps with a life coach cough cough.

But what most people don’t realize is that the simple act of asking these questions has the power to buy oneself more time. Why is that? Because in giving an honest assessment of how purposeful and dense each of our actions are, we give ourselves a clearer view of how much time we’re wasting on the things that are neither fulfilling right now or helping to fulfill us in the future. We’re given the chance to buy back the time that we’d otherwise be wasting on things that are not serving us in the least.

But you have to be honest with yourself. Some people might say that TV is a huge time waster and a great example of something that isn’t fulfilling nor is an investment in the future, but if TV is something that you know purposefully relaxes you, and you’re cognizant of its effects, then you may have good reason in watching it each day.

Some people might hate their job, and it’s not what they want to be doing but the money that comes with it is an investment in the future. That’s when questions of efficiency and value that I mentioned before might come into play.

Some people may be thrilled and certainly enjoying themselves by telling their boss to fuck off in this moment, but in reality, they like their job. They’re riled up for no reason and while it’s fun telling the boss to fuck off, this is not ultimately a good decision down the road. We’re humans and have the ability to weigh consequences. We don’t have to live in dog brain all the time. We can make decisions based on the least amount of regret.

There’s variation between situations and people of course, but being mindful enough to check in and ask yourself, “Am I doing what I want to be doing” and/or, “Is what I’m doing at least an investment in the future?”, is a massive launching point in the awareness of time spent, therefore offering you a clearer perspective into what does and doesn’t need to take up your very precious time.