When There’s Nothing You Can Do

How do we find peace when we have such a lack of control?

Ryan Fan
Invisible Illness
Published in
3 min readMay 24, 2020

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Do you ever feel like no matter what you do, nothing is going to change a situation?

Do you ever feel like no matter how much you try to make things better, no change happens?

I feel that way — in fact, I feel that way all the time, as a teacher in Baltimore City. Yes, sometimes I feel hopeless, like there’s nothing I can do, but I know that just being there is important, and that the fact that I a ma witness to the forces around me that just make life so damn hard for the people around me.

In Baltimore, we’ve had over 300 murders every year since 2015. No matter how many new police commissioners, legislative plans, or anything else that’s happened, it just seems like, well, there’s nothing we can do tho changed he culture of violence in the city.

I understand that executing success comes one step at a time, but what do we do when there’s nothing we can do. I’m currently watching Charm City, a movie about Baltimore’s violence over the past couple of years and a documentary following various people in East Baltimore, from police officers, drug dealers, community organizers, and just regular community people.

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Ryan Fan
Invisible Illness

Believer, Baltimore City IEP Chair, and 2:39 marathon runner. Diehard fan of “The Wire.” Support me by becoming a Medium member: https://bit.ly/39Cybb8