The Secret Of RESILIENCE

Misconception

The concept has lost its meaning in translation because of overemphasis in many disciplines beyond Psychology. As highlighted by researchers and clinicians, the concept has developed at a rapid rate from being relatively unknown to ubiquity. We shouldn’t overlook the fact that the environmental and societal situations and contexts have formed the collective view held today. Coupled with scepticism amongst academics, when resilience is a trait, process, or outcome which has further compromised its meaning. To the extent of becoming a buzzword nowadays, individuals have become accustomed to a single-minded view.

This has resulted in resilience being perceived as:

1. A “Miracle Drug” personality trait, which can heal the past and right all wrongs.

2. Individuals are born with it or not.

3. By practicing mindfulness, you can achieve resilience.

4. Without the involvement of a support mechanism, we cannot achieve resilience.

What’s Real Resilience

Resilience is a highly sought-after topic in positive psychology and wider discussions. Many researchers define resilience as being able to withstand hardship and recover psychologically. Authors Sheryl Sandberg and Adam Grant advocate resilience is like a muscle it contracts and extends depending on the emotional state. This shows that the greater the challenge, the more immune in life we become. To achieve this, we must experience a degree of emotional distress. This makes resilience a human quality empowering because once you discover its authentic nature it can lead towards a path of self-fulfilment. According to author Linda Graham, to develop inner strength, we should abide by the 6 C’s of resilience. Which are:

1. Calm

2. Compassion

3. Clarity

4. Connection

5. Competence

6. Courage

Resilience can also take the shape of self-learning, which involves investing through the lens of self-evaluation by grasping opportunities for self-development and having the courage to exploit. According to many scholars, self-learning can occur in many forms and some ways are:

1. Allow yourself to be exposed to a broad set of emotions.

2. Develop a support network that you can trust upon.

3. Learn to better channel your emotions with the help of an expert.

4. Self-awareness is critical to ensuring wellness and self-care.

5. Explore your purpose in life that shall keep you motivated and occupied in life.

6. Having a positive outlook on life would enable you to improve self-esteem.

7. Be accepting of change rather than fearing it.

8. Become proactive when resolving issues rather than being accepting.

There are many conflicting views on what resilience comprises, but the general framework is:

1. Emotional Wellbeing: Enabling individuals to regulate their emotions and thought processes.
2. Inner Drive: The way we respond when challenged in life and what keeps us motivated daily.
3. Future Focus: Planning and being able to develop contingencies when challenged.
4. Relationships: Having a network that can manifest psychological and physical pillars.
5. Self-Awareness: Importance of physical health as poor health can affect other pillars.

Individuals must equally become self-aware, as resilience can lead to the unthinkable. According to Harvard Business Review, when individuals become overly tolerant of adversity, that can lead to dire consequences. In the workplace, this may affect leadership, team, and organisational effectiveness.

We shouldn’t forget that being resilient comes with the territory as individuals can become oversensitive to their environment. This may cause them to associate themselves with like-minded people above others, leading to disharmony and distrust in several aspects of life.

Importance in Life

The challenges in life make the resilience concept synonymous. This makes it critical to form a support network that is accessible to individuals developed on trust and mutual understanding. The key to resilience in life is continuous learning, adapting, and growing as an individual. Those who cannot persevere will continue to dwell in the face of adversity.

Career

Career resilience is a trait most admired by employers because it involves continuous learning and navigating the murky waters. Research by the Jobsite CV-Library on 300 UK employers shows 57% want resilient candidates and 71% consider the ability to adapt as a resilient trait. For employees to discover their true potential, they must preserve their self-concept. Resilience is a voyage into the unknown for self-reflection and learning which employers can become part of by allocating resources. According to Deloitte, we need leaders who can steer a sinking vessel ashore. This is critical, as an incompetent leader would increase the risk involved. Employers can further promote resilience in the workplace by encouraging individuals to prioritise self-development. Many of us may struggle to comprehend the frightening pace of change. As the Pew study shows, 72% of Americans are anxious about labour uncertainty in the technology sector due to technological advancements. To develop career resilience, we must:

1. Optimism: Losing hope makes you vulnerable and makes it difficult to conquer fear.

2. Persevere: Understanding is crucial to avoid acting in the least rewarding way.

3. Entrepreneurial Mindset: This will allow you to be creative in the way you respond to challenges.

4. Reflective: Review what you are currently doing and what we can do.

5. Focus: Take each setback as an experience and apply it productively.

Life

By perceiving change as an enemy rather than a blessing has entangled us in a cobweb. The way we respond to unfolding events determines not only the outcome but the psychological impact. To ride through the tide, we must prepare to walk the path less travelled through the lens of curiosity. Those who are immune to challenges aren’t amateurs but better equipped to cope with emerging threats. The level of resiliency displayed throughout life varies upon experience. According to Bounce Back Project, a resilient life can lead to:

1. Reduction in depression
2. Increase emotional wellbeing
3. Supports working memory
4. Enhances the immune system
5. Better relationships
6. Acts as an emotional shield when the emotional state is compromised

Such measures are necessary for reframing our thoughts to have a superior outlook, as each change affects people differently.

Family

Family is like a balloon because it is strong and elastic, which enables them to regain their composure quickly after a period of turbulence. A rare quality in a family is their ability to exercise their skillset, share experience, and provide impetus. This can help influence and shape the lives of loved ones. Those that are resilient emerge stronger despite there being conflicting interests amongst members, personality clashes, and indifferences. According to Positive Psychology, each setback encountered enables families to become stronger together. EveryMind suggests that resilience is a continuous process in a family and we can embrace that by:

1. Open Communication Channels: family and friends can become a support network.
2. Nurture Relationships: This involves resolving differences and reconnecting with loved ones.
3. Take Care of Each Other: Prioritising yourself and caring for each other.
4. Priorities: Life is short during busy times always strive to create family time and plan things together.
5. Positivity: Always be open-minded and don’t dwell on the past as its irreversible.

How Strategically Stopping Helps to Cultivate Resilience?

According to Ethical Leadership, in-demand leaders consider resilience a process. Being resilient isn’t about recovery, but becoming mindful when faced with setbacks and challenges. This makes CEOs that possess integrity and resilience a rare commodity. Part of being on a resilient journey involves garnering self-confidence. There is no consensus amongst researchers on what self-confidence entails. According to Positive Psychology, self-confidence can lead to:

1. Improved health because of their ability to handle emotions better.

2. They develop stronger relationships in life due to well-defined boundaries. This enables them to focus on improvements.

3. Spend more time with loved ones because of mutual understanding and effective planning.

4. By prioritising, it enables individuals to fulfil their goals.

Those with an internal locus of control are more accepting of their situation compared to those with an external locus of control. This is because they display greater emotional intelligence which enables them to regulate emotions. Positive Psychology further emphasises that the ability to process emotions is integral to achieving psychological adaptation and wellbeing. This ability enables us to become immune to wider emotionally charged matters. According to Helping Guide individuals that display emotional intelligence are:

1. Self-Management

2. Self-Awareness

3. Social Awareness

4. Relationship Management

For this reason, resilient people aren’t victims but fighters. This spirit enables them to be effective communicators, which are critical for emotional resilience. Mental Health has identified 3 approaches to follow:

1. Stop — instead of being emotionally charged, take your time.

2. Regroup — Don’t feel pressurised and take your time rather than commit yourself

3. Communicate — Clearly and calmly engage in a dialogue.

How does mindfulness help with that?

Mindful isn’t about preventing emotions in life but becoming synonymous. Research suggests psychological resilience breeds in mindful people. Scientists and experts continue to unearth new research on the impact of mindfulness on building resilience. Academic research shows that resilient people overcome trauma in life because they prefer not to dwell on the past. Negative emotions become anonymous, promoting positivity in life which enables us to pursue resourceful relationships. Mindfulness enables us to explore personal resilience, making us immune to challenges. Further to that, mindfulness mediation is therapeutic and develops resilience. Corporate Wellness Magazine insists it ensures:

1. Individuals become more conscious

2. Make informed choices

3. Decrease emotional reactivity

4. Enhanced productivity

5. Effective communication

6. Improved focus

Further research shows that mindfulness can cause cognitive flexibility and self-regulation. This is critical, as it enables individuals to exercise greater control over life.

Recommendations

To develop resilience in life, I suggest:

Mindfulness Based Resilience Initiative

This would be useful because it would promote mindfulness, resilience, mental and physical health, and reduce burnout. Further to that would enable individuals to do their activities without dwelling leading to better relationships, productivity, and communication.

Mindful Journaling

This enables individuals to digest what is on their minds and regulate their emotions by evoking mindfulness. This further instils confidence and self-identity and provides self-assurance in finding a comprehensive solution. By journaling it enables individuals to express their feelings in the form they desire.

Forming a Support Network

By distancing yourself from disruptive forces would enable you to overcome challenges and better equip yourself. This is because those that are a disruptive force are unlikely to support you in moments of need. To make the most you need to surround yourself with people that accept who you are as a person. These are people you can trust upon, express your feelings, provide reassurance, and scream for you.

Become a Member of a Group The most effective tool is being a member of a group. This will allow you to express your feelings, thoughts, and emotions in a refreshing environment. It would also provide self-confidence and assurance that you are part of something where you feel valued and celebrated by them. Further, it will increase the prospects of finding a solution because like-minded people may have experienced similar ordeals or are. Knowing this will make it a life-changing experience for you.

Choose a Hobby

Joining a club or having a pastime activity that would be a pleasant distraction. This will help you channel your emotions effectively to improve mental health. It would also allow you to strengthen your relationships, reduce stress, prevent overthink and better manage depression, and in the process ensures wellbeing in a composed environment.

Goal Orientated

Prioritising yourself in life won’t only motivate you but inspire you to keep pushing the boundaries, making you further immune to negativity. Not only will you grow as an individual, but allow you to self-evaluate and draw plans accordingly for self-development. Being goal-orientated will further be mentally rewarding, as you can relate to the journey, making it enjoyable.

In summary, many of us may not be familiar with resilience or ever heard of the concept. We don’t need to look further beyond our personal experiences to understand the way we overcame difficulties in life. These experiences didn’t only enable us to prosper but equip us for the unforeseeable. Thanks to resilience, I have become what I am today, if I didn’t embrace the lonely, tiring, and challenging path. I wouldn’t have developed the inner strength or become intuitive. Because of this process, I gained not only self-confidence, but I identified my PURPOSE in life. To many, it may seem an enormous sacrifice in life to walk on a less travelled path, but those that have experienced its fruits can vouch. The longer you delay the process, the more burdened, irritated, and nervous you shall become with darkness ascending in search of inner closure.