“The Dog Ate My Library Book!”
And Other Ridiculous Excuses People Give Librarians for Not Returning Their Books on Time
The art of storytelling is alive and well, which is something you soon learn when you work at a public library. I’m not talking about the stories in the books. I’m talking about the excuses some patrons dream up to weasel out of paying their fines.
I asked librarians to share best fine avoidance lines patrons have handed them over the years. Here’s a sampling:
The books were lost in a landslide. It was an act of nature so I shouldn’t have to pay.
The TSA confiscated my DVDs.
I threw them all away because another librarian told me that was okay.
I’ve been way too busy to renew my books.
I panicked when a bee flew in my car, so I grabbed the book and threw it at the bee and the book went out the window. On the freeway. So I couldn’t stop.
I had no idea that I had to return them!
I loaned them to my therapist and she didn’t give them back. This is really giving me trust issues.
When my boyfriend broke up with me, he stole all my library books.
