This is an email from The Update, a newsletter by James Finn - The Blog.

Dad’s Funeral and Finding Strength

LGBTQ news and a personal update

Urn with yellow roses by Peter on Adobe Stock

Dear readers and friends,

Yesterday was rough. Hell, who am I kidding? Today is rough. We held Dad’s memorial service yesterday in a small Baptist church in rural Michigan. Although my siblings and I agreed to a non-traditional service, what really happened was a Baptist funeral with an urn of ashes instead of a coffin.

I can’t complain. People did what they knew how to do, and everyone was as kind and loving as they could be. I didn’t even mind the overt proselytizing during the service. Dad would have wanted that, so who am I to object?

What’s so hard is that I feel now is the time to move on, but I don’t know how. I came home to Dad’s and my little house yesterday, but nothing felt over. I sat in my recliner looking at that urn, asking myself, “Now what?”

I’ve spent the last three years caring for Dad in increasingly difficult circumstances. Toward the end, caring for him was a full-time job. At the very end, it was more than I thought I could bear. But I did it anyway. Because Dad needed me.

I’ve had a hard time writing

I’m still having a hard time. Nothing excites me. I can’t sink my teeth into a hot story. I couldn’t write about LGBTQ advocacy yesterday. I can’t today either. I’ve tried, but the words won’t flow from my fingertips. I hope tomorrow is a better day. I trust it will be.

Until then, I want to share with you the work I’ve done since Dad passed.

News and Opinion

Here’s my biweekly take on issues I think the major media haven’t been getting quite right.

I hope you read and engage with these stories, because I think they matter.

If you aren’t a Medium member, please click on the underlined text links. They bypass the paywall

Archdiocese of Detroit Joins Extremist Homophobia Trend

Leaders of the Roman Catholic Church in the United States have become increasingly hateful toward LGBTQ people since same-sex marriage became legal. The Archdiocese of Detroit is the latest to join the trend of demonizing members of gender and sexual minorities. Two new developments are especially shocking.

Donald Trump Agrees He’s Most Pro-Gay President Ever

Donald Trump and the Log Cabin Republicans claim Trump is the “most pro-gay president in history.” What has this absurd lie got to do with dinosaurs? More than you might think! And it might just get Trump re-elected.

Gay Men and Pansies in NH Senate Race

A retired Army general is running for a Senate seat in NH by slinging the gay slur “pansy.” I have some news for the general about that hardy flower — and about sexism and homophobia.

What Lunch With Jerry Falwell Jr. Taught Me

Jerry Falwell Jr. and I grew up in the same Evangelical world. I even had lunch and played basketball with him one day when we were both teens. Now that he’s caught up in yet another Evangelical sex scandal, I ponder the different choices we made.

Please Remember Prism & Pen!

Prism & Pen, a new Medium publication I help edit, focuses on LGBTQ storytelling. Some of my more personal work, especially about my dad, is over there.

Here are some recent contributors. Check em out.

Esther Spurrill-Jones, BFoundAPen, Fred Shirley, David Wade Chambers, Artemis Shishir, Valentine Wiggin, James Patrick Nelson, Gaby Rosales, Presley Thomas, Evan McCoy, Loren Olson, Ken Wilson, Chandler Myer, NaNa’sworld, Liam Heitmann-Ryce, Elle Fredine, Tre L. Loadholt, Tabitha Lowndes, Jonathan | sex & theology, Melissa Speed, Emma Nwosisi, Dr. Thomas J. West III, Arabelle J., Edris Quinn C., Zoey Milford, Ellie Rebecca, Dave Smurthwaite, Till Kaeslin, Edis Rune, Kim Barrett, Srinath, Steve Alexander, Cristiano Diprima, William Kuhn, Steve Alexander, Cristiano Diprima, William Kuhn, Dennett, Michael Constable, Jim Martens, Stephen Foster

Today, Prism & Pen releases its own newsletter, courtesy of Esther Spurrill-Jones. Could please check it out and hit the subscribe button? Thanks so much!

With much love to my readers and friends,


Prism & Pen Weekly Digest




Collected Writings. Stories and ramblings from a long-time LGBTQ thinker and activist.

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James Finn

James Finn

James Finn is a columnist for the LA Blade, a former Air Force intelligence analyst, an alumnus of Act Up NY, and an agented but unpublished novelist.

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