His New Boyfriend Has HIV. Is Sex OK?

Yes! U=U changes everything.

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Dear Aunty Jimothy,

I’m an 18-year-old gay guy who’s never had a boyfriend. I just met this dude in college and we’ve gone out like five times. He is Sooo hot. And I like him Sooo much. But he just told me he has HIV! He’s known for a year. He says he’s ‘undetectable.’ Is that for real? We haven’t had sex, but he sucked me off once and we’ve done stuff with our hands. What do I do now!?

Shocked in Chicago

Dear Shocked,

Child! Now look at what you’ve made me do. I’m clutching my pearls already!

But deep breath, please! You’re OK! You could have kissed that boy 16 ways from Sunday and not worry about getting HIV. (Even if he could give you the virus, which if he’s really undetectable, he can’t. More on that in a jiff.)

Important facts about HIV transmission

1. Deep Kissing? According to medical experts, the risk of HIV transmission from open-mouth kissing is considered to be anywhere from negligible to non-existent. While there is a slight theoretical risk of HIV transmission if both partners’ mouths are freely bleeding, in practice we don’t think that’s ever actually happened. (The US CDC has some cases on file, but they’re suspect…