10 Targets Not Off Limits to Russian Cyberattacks
Welcome, Russian Hackers!
President Joe “Get Off My Lawn” Biden recently gave your President Putin a long list of areas off limits to Russian cyberattacks. Energy, water, health care, mundane stuff like that. But don’t despair, comrades, there are still plenty of places where your malicious attentions would be completely acceptable:
The Municipal Parking Ticket Database
Wiping out everyone’s unpaid tickets is probably the single biggest step you could take to boost your popularity while also disrupting U.S. society. Think about it: the parking enforcers are also in the ransom business. Taking their data hostage would be pretty meta, or at least ironic.
The Author Website of Chad, My Former Classmate
America’s strength is the belief that anyone can make it here, including people who aren’t especially smart or talented, such as Chad. That is exactly what the cluelessly smug expression in the photo on the inside back cover of his best-seller is claiming. If you can’t wipe that smirk off his face, at least wipe his face off the web.
