Santa or My Ex-Boyfriend ?
He sees me when I’m sleeping.
He loves being in control of vulnerable people around him who do most of the work.
He knows how to get into a locked house and past a restraining order.
He’ll use the word “ho” when talking to me at least three times.
Though I insist he’s real, the police don’t believe me.
He acts superior because he knows more about reindeer and geography.
He eats cookies all the time but gives me gym equipment for Christmas even though I didn’t ask for it.
I found out that he was married after I was already sitting on his lap.
He flung a lump of coal at me through the window.
I sent him a letter and never got a response.
He is obsessed with making me act in a way that he considers “nice” and tells me he will punish me if I don’t listen.
I saw mom kissing him and couldn’t bear to tell dad.
He spends most of the year asking for acknowledgements for the one day he does work.
He is old-fashioned when it comes to who drives.
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