Photo by Matt Briney on Unsplash

Fairytale Characters Visit Urgent Care

Because Doc the dwarf doesn’t have a medical license

Once upon a time, in a faraway kingdom with no universal healthcare…

Receptionist: I’m afraid since you don’t have any insurance, you’re going to need to pay for this visit out of pocket.

Jack: Do you take magic beans?

Receptionist: No, but we’ll accept your firstborn.

*

Princess 1: You’ve got to help me, Doctor! I kissed a frog who claimed he was really a prince, and now I have these nasty warts!

Doctor: The good news is you don’t have warts. That’s a myth. You do, however, have herpes.

Princess 1: I suppose all adventurous damsels do.

*

Doctor: How can I help you today, my boy?

Pinocchio: It’s awfully embarrassing. Promise not to laugh?

Doctor: Of course! I’m a professional. I’ve seen everything

Pinocchio: And you won’t tell nobody?

Doctor: I assure you, anything you say will be kept under the strictest doctor-patient confidentiality. Now tell me what’s the matter.