If You Give My Jewish Mother a Phone Call, She’ll Ask You Why You’re Too Busy for Your Own Mother
A new book for those with overbearing moms
If you give my Jewish mother a phone call, she’s going to say something like, “So you do know how to use the phone.”
And if you remind her that you have two young kids and work full-time, she’ll probably tell you about how busy she is too because she’s always schlepping for your father.
And if she tells you how busy she is too, you’re probably going to hear about her lunch with Edna. On the topic of Edna, she’ll ask you if you remember Edna.
If you hesitate in any way, she’ll remind you in great detail about that time when you were two years old with chubby pulkes and Edna baked challah from scratch and you ate the whole thing and she and Edna were kvelling.
And while she’s talking about challah, she’ll probably describe in great detail the challah she ate during her 1973 trip to Israel with her women’s group before she was diagnosed with irritable bowel syndrome.
When you try to change the subject, she’ll tell you about how gluten and dairy make her constipated now and how the cost of Metamucil is astronomical.
