The Exhausted Parent’s Guide to Building a Leprechaun Trap

Is this the year you will finally catch that magical creature?

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1. When March arrives, don’t mention St. Patrick’s Day, leprechauns, or Lucky Charms.

With any luck, your child will not remember the holiday and you will not actually have to help build a leprechaun trap.

2. Fail to turn off the TV before a Lucky Charms commercial comes on.

Watch your kid’s eyes light up. Sigh, and make a mental note to cancel your cable subscription and from now on only let your child play with kids from screen-free households.

3. Search for “simple leprechaun traps” on Pinterest.

Get 1 million results recommending you construct what amounts to a complex Rube Goldberg machine from materials that must be special ordered and will arrive in 4–6 months. Print out a picture of the simplest-looking trap and hand it to your child. Watch as everything around you gets coated in glitter and small bits of green paper. Eat a bowl of Lucky Charms.

4. Field questions about whether or not leprechauns are really real.